Poll of the Day > I got some kind of sobering news recently..

(+) Yeah! (+)

My brother went to the doctor for a full physical some time ago, and the news came back that he's pre-diabetic. He's basically at risk, but with some proper diet changes it's avoidable.

He was telling me to give me a heads up. I always knew there was a decent chance we'd be at risk since my mom and a few aunts/uncles have it. But my brother isn't taking it sitting down, and he's taking the opportunity to make some real changes. He's got a lot of big plans for life and this isn't part of it.

My brother is a very driven and motivated person, who gets what he wants in life and solves any problems in the way. The problem is, I'm... not. It's something I've been thinking about and trying to deal with for a very long time, but whether it's due to depression or just general low self esteem, I just don't place a lot of value in my own life.

It's actually a major factor in the reason I don't have very much in life. I subconsciously don't think I'm worthy of having a great job, nice things, or finding love, so I don't try as hard as I could do obtain those things. And when I take a look at my comparatively hollow life, I think it's acceptable for me.

Diabetes is certainly not something I want, and I'll try to avoid it. But as long as I have these psychological issues, I don't think that would be any more successful than my efforts to improve other areas of my life. Any way you slice it, it seems like that's the problem I'm going to have to tackle first and foremost.
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keyblader1985 posted...

It's actually a major factor in the reason I don't have very much in life. I subconsciously don't think I'm worthy of having a great job, nice things, or finding love, so I don't try as hard as I could do obtain those things. And when I take a look at my comparatively hollow life, I think it's acceptable for me.

Diabetes is certainly not something I want, and I'll try to avoid it. But as long as I have these psychological issues, I don't think that would be any more successful than my efforts to improve other areas of my life. Any way you slice it, it seems like that's the problem I'm going to have to tackle first and foremost.

Realizing your inherent self-worth can be a difficult journey for some, but it is really important to do. Don't think you must delve into these issues by yourself--you aren't the first person who has felt this way and you won't be the last. There is psychological research and interventions designed to help individuals address these concerns.

I wish you the best of luck with all of this.
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keyblader1985 posted...

The problem is, I'm... not. It's something I've been thinking about and trying to deal with for a very long time, but whether it's due to depression or just general low self esteem, I just don't place a lot of value in my own life.

It's actually a major factor in the reason I don't have very much in life. I subconsciously don't think I'm worthy of having a great job, nice things, or finding love, so I don't try as hard as I could do obtain those things. And when I take a look at my comparatively hollow life, I think it's acceptable for me.

Listen, I've been reading your posts for years. You seem like a very decent guy.I honestly think it's because you really haven't met someone in real life yet to tell you this.

As for depression/low self esteem, you need to look at yourself and try to see what the root causes are. Plus you seem like you have a good head on your shoulders

IDK man, life is rough, you need to remember that the best supporter in your life should be yourself. If you keep beating yourself up for no reason you will always be miserable. Work on yourself and do things that you feel may better your view on yourself. Saying you don't value your own life is a bit dramatic. There is no way your life is that bad based on what you post about. Just take a minute to sit down and really think about what's causing these thoughts, it is very unhealthy
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Thanks, guys. I do try to look at things rationally and really try to understand them, but for some reason I've never been able to get a bead on why I have these issues. My best guess right now is that it was simply a snowball effect, and each failure I experienced over time just fed into it.

On the practical side, the biggest challenge to eating better is going to be cutting out carbs. I love bread.
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I love bread too. Giving it up is hard. It's harder to not be well. Something to consider is that you should be eating pretty low glycemic if you're at risk for diabetes. Health is the most important thing to work on. When that's gone nothing else is enjoyable or simple. You are worth taking care of!
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Given that diet and exercise are two factors for reducing your risk of diabetes, it shouldn't be *too* hard to avoid. After all, it's not like Type-1 which you can't avoid and, afaik, is irreversible.
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Here's a quick heads-up: I've struggled with a lack of self-worth my whole life. I don't think I know what it feels like to feel pride or be happy with myself.

I'm also now married. I still don't love myself, even as I deeply love others. It's not something that falling in love fixes. Your self-worth can only come from your self. I'm working on this right now in counseling. My advice is that you don't expect something outside to fix what's broken inside. I know it sucks. I know it hurts. But you are absolutely worthwhile. You matter.

I wish I felt the same way about myself, but I'm working on that. I'm sure you can too. You're worth loving.

SushiSquid posted...

Here's a quick heads-up: I've struggled with a lack of self-worth my whole life. I don't think I know what it feels like to feel pride or be happy with myself.

I'm also now married. I still don't love myself, even as I deeply love others. It's not something that falling in love fixes. Your self-worth can only come from your self. I'm working on this right now in counseling. My advice is that you don't expect something outside to fix what's broken inside. I know it sucks. I know it hurts. But you are absolutely worthwhile. You matter.

I wish I felt the same way about myself, but I'm working on that. I'm sure you can too. You're worth loving.

Having someone love you didn't help at all? I'm kind of banking on that helping my situation, if I could ever find someone that is.
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keyblader1985 posted...

My brother went to the doctor for a full physical some time ago, and the news came back that he's pre-diabetic. He's basically at risk, but with some proper diet changes it's avoidable.

This reminds me of a current storyline in Eastenders.
At least you've got heads up about this though. I has stomach pain for years, thrown up acid a lot and had no idea what it was. The doctors didn't either. It wasn't until my older sister(who is now no longer with us) told me that stomach ulcers run in my family that I got tested for it and it turns out that was the problem. To cut a long story short it ended up bursting, I ended up throwing up blood and being in hospital. I had a op to remove the burst ulcer and now have a scar down my stomach(like Kratos from GoW). I've now told my brother, younger sister and even dad to get tested for these things if they ever have bad stomach pain and throw up acid.

keyblader1985 posted...

Diabetes is certainly not something I want, and I'll try to avoid it. But as long as I have these psychological issues, I don't think that would be any more successful than my efforts to improve other areas of my life. Any way you slice it, it seems like that's the problem I'm going to have to tackle first and foremost.

I've a feeling no matter what people tell you it won't change how you feel about being yourself. I don't know if you're getting any help with these issue but, like with addiction attending some kind of meetings can help you put things into prospective. I probably should attend CBT myself if truth be told. Still witch what happened to my sister that gave me prospective on my own life and life is indeed way too short to be miserable while going through it. I hope you fix your demons man.

KogaSteelfang posted...

Having someone love you didn't help at all? I'm kind of banking on that helping my situation, if I could ever find someone that is.

Expecting someone to carry your burdens isn't a great idea nor is it a great idea to expect a relationship to fix everything. Personally I know I need to fix my own issues and be in a good place before I even think about dating. Not that it's a choice for me to not date but perhaps fate is trying to tell me that.
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KogaSteelfang posted...

Having someone love you didn't help at all?

It helps. But it doesn't fix the problem. It helps me especially because I married a social worker, so she's been very supportive. But she still can't fix what hurts inside of me deep down. I have to work on that myself. And I am. I'm much better now than I used to be.

mastermix3000 posted...

IDK man, life is rough, you need to remember that the best supporter in your life should be yourself.

Significant amount of wisdom in this sentence.
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You don't really have to give up any particular type of food. Just eat less of it. Sometimes a lot less. And exercise a little bit.
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My girlfriend is diabetic. It sucks but it is in no way super life altering. You're gonna have to change your lifestyle regardless anyway.
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^Yeah, not having it is definitely better than having it.

Thanks for the replies, everyone.
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