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Kolibri X 07/13/17 11:45:32 AM #1: |
I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, "Oh, like you’re doing now, you silly bitch?" I was taken aback, and all I could say was "Huh?" but he kept cutting me off and going "huh? huh? huh?" and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen bottles of Alpha Brain in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like "Sir, you need to pay for those first." At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bottles and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually "to prevent any electrical infetterence," and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bottle and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly and doing squats. --- Platinum GameFAQs Member http://i.imgur.com/VgwI8qO.gif ... Copied to Clipboard!
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CrimsonAngeI 07/13/17 11:45:59 AM #2: |
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pinky0926 07/13/17 11:47:42 AM #3: |
A liberal Muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx, known atheist.
“Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!” At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock. “How old is this rock?” The arrogant professor smirked quite liberally and smugly replied “4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian” “Wrong. It’s been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real… then it should be an animal now” The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears. The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named “Small Government” flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country. The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity. Semper Fi --- CE's Resident Scotsman. http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z316/CeliaOfTheSky/Pinky0926.jpg ... Copied to Clipboard!
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vashmoto 07/13/17 11:51:01 AM #4: |
Was his cart full of elk backstrap, eggs, and avocado?
--- http://i.imgur.com/HNHCd9K.png Screamin' "brand new" when they just sanitized the old **** ... Copied to Clipboard!
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EnragedSlith 07/13/17 11:54:07 AM #5: |
Haha, that reminds me of the time I met Joe Rogan.
I got roped into watching my 4 month old niece while my sister got her hair done. So I'm sitting there in the waiting area of a hair salon with my niece, when who walks in but Joe Rogan. I was nervous as shit, and kept looking at him as he read a magazine and waited, but was too scared to say anything to him. Pretty soon, though, my niece started crying, and I tried to quiet her down because I didn't want to bother Joe, but she wouldn't stop. Joe eventually got up and walked over. He reached down and ran a hand through her hair and asked what was wrong. I replied that she was probably hungry or something. So Joe put down his magazine, picked up my niece, and lifted up his shirt. He breast fed her right in the middle of the hair salon. Chill guy, really nice about it. --- ... Copied to Clipboard!
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HBKick18 07/13/17 11:54:07 AM #6: |
I missed these
--- Proud fan of the worst team in American professional sports history: the Chicago Cubs. ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Returning_CEmen 07/13/17 11:54:29 AM #7: |
vashmoto posted...
Was his cart full of elk backstrap, eggs, and avocado? And kambucha --- ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Leight_Weight 07/13/17 7:52:29 PM #8: |
HBKick18 posted...
I miss these --- "Every man dies, but not every man truly lives." ... Copied to Clipboard!
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judasmaiden15 07/13/17 7:53:10 PM #9: |
I thought he would be nice based off fear factor
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CruelBuffalo 07/13/17 7:57:03 PM #10: |
My favorite was when the original story tc posted had Hillary clinton as the person XD
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