Poll of the Day > Were you bullied in school ?

(+) Yeah! (+)

were you?
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Not proud of it, but I actually was the school bully from 3rd-5th grade.

Otherwise no... I was pretty much invisible up until high school
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DoubleOSnake posted...

were you?

Yep. Outside of school too. Surprisingly though I enjoyed my school life more then my home life at that point.
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wwinterj25 posted...

DoubleOSnake posted...

were you?

Yep. Outside of school too. Surprisingly though I enjoyed my school life more then my home life at that point.

did you go to like a really bad school district?
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Not really. At most a few folks teased me occasionally about my high water jeans and shuttering but beyond that, no.
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Just some name calling.
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Somewhat but I was always quick to throw punches back. I didn't put up with it
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No, I don't even know if there's a bully in school.
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DoubleOSnake posted...

did you go to like a really bad school district?

I'm from the UK and went to a public school. The school wasn't the issue just a handful of idiots in my classes. The same idiots lived near me too. Most of them just followed the "leader". Said leader was the guy who caused the most trouble. It was never physical harm to me or my family though from them. Still I've found karma is great as this guy has now been deported out of this country for reasons.
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Middle school but not high school
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No and I stood up to bullies that were bullying others. I got into a LOT of fights and was all worth it because some of those bullies got hurt really bad. Me and my best friend in 6th grade beat the living hell out of a fat ass bully so bad he never came back to echool, total win and felt great.

I got bullied plenty in elementary school and high school. All started because I refused to stop being friends with another kid, so the kids that bullied him turned on me too. The bullying didn't really stop until I had a growth spurt during grade 11 and was finally big enough to both stand up for myself and back it up.

Before my growth spurt I was significantly smaller than pretty much all the guys in my grade, I would get into fights but I was smaller and weaker, they didn't go well. I would get spit on, one kid threatened to shoot me at one point.

Elementary and High School were the worst times of my life. Life got significantly better with post-secondary education and work.
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In elementary school I was. About halfway through middle school I finally snapped and punched my bully in the face and broke his nose. After that I wasn't bullied. Granted, I wasn't "popular", but no one was actively bullying me.
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gguirao posted...

Just some name calling.

This and this was before I started coming back at them. When I stopped being easy to pushover, the name calling slowed down a lot. And physical bullying wasn't even an issue for me unless I was beijg jumped (which stopped before elementary school was over with). I was big, tall, could defend myself (though anyone with even a small martial art background could and still can probably whoop my ass easily) and wasn't afraid to do so if necessary.

I find that bullies don't usually go for the ones that stand up for themselves. They go for pacifists and other people they feel are too weak or scared to fight back. Easy targets.

Yup.

Didn't stop till I fought back. Wish I had realized that was the only solution sooner.
I'd never recommend starting shit yourself. But if you do become the victim of yet another provocation/attack and the situation is right (if he's got 4 pals w/ him to join in for example, the situation is probably not right).... The key to fighting back is to:
a) fuck the concept of "fighting fair" or gentlemanly
b) use whatever is available to you...objects as weapons, your own nails, your teeth, whatever
c) Allow yourself "snap" as it's called, and be as berserk, loud, and aggressive as possible. Tap into all the festering anger from your treatment by bullies that you've bottled up.

The goal isn't just to win the fight, it's to get all the other bullies in school to fear you, because they think you're crazy. Then they'll leave you alone and look for an easier target. All it really takes is one dramatic outburst, and word will spread.

In some years I was bullied, in other years I was the bully. But it was mostly minor stuff (almost entirely verbal, not physical), and it was all mainly pre-high school. I was the closest thing to a popular kid there was in elementary school, went though my dark patch in middle school, and by high school I was relatively friendly with most people and no one really wanted to fuck with me.

Bullying and cliques were never really much of a major thing in my school district. It's why I always have trouble really identifying with the usual Hollywood assumptions about what school is like in movies and TV shows.



streamofthesky posted...

Didn't stop till I fought back. Wish I had realized that was the only solution sooner.

The goal isn't just to win the fight, it's to get all the other bullies in school to fear you, because they think you're crazy. Then they'll leave you alone and look for an easier target. All it really takes is one dramatic outburst, and word will spread.

Definitely this.

At the height of my issues with bullies (which honestly, was probably just a couple of different people who would shit on me because I was relatively passive in middle school), almost every one ended with me eventually having a psychotic break and just screaming at the bully until they were so freaked out/embarrassed that they backed off to look for easier prey.

One time I was getting mocked on the school bus by one consistent bully, but that day I happened to have a massive sinus headache, and pain has ALWAYS made me irritable as fuck. So after a moment of him just taunting me and trying to get my attention while I was trying to ignore him, I turned to him and just stared hate and told him in a very serious voice that if he didn't shut the fuck up in the next ten seconds, I was going to jam my thumbs into his eye sockets, slam him to the ground, and smash his head repeatedly into the floor until his skull cracked and brains started leaking out. Then I turned around and very deliberately started counting to ten under my breath. That kid never spoke another word to me again.

The real problem is, this probably isn't a viable tactic anymore, because these days if you pull that sort of thing off, YOU'LL be the one getting expelled and sent to mandatory psych counseling because they'll assume you're a potential school shooter threat and zero tolerance your ass.


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streamofthesky posted...

Yup.

Didn't stop till I fought back. Wish I had realized that was the only solution sooner.
I'd never recommend starting shit yourself. But if you do become the victim of yet another provocation/attack and the situation is right (if he's got 4 pals w/ him to join in for example, the situation is probably not right).... The key to fighting back is to:
a) fuck the concept of "fighting fair" or gentlemanly
b) use whatever is available to you...objects as weapons, your own nails, your teeth, whatever
c) Allow yourself "snap" as it's called, and be as berserk, loud, and aggressive as possible. Tap into all the festering anger from your treatment by bullies that you've bottled up.

The goal isn't just to win the fight, it's to get all the other bullies in school to fear you, because they think you're crazy. Then they'll leave you alone and look for an easier target. All it really takes is one dramatic outburst, and word will spread.

I assure you, it doesn't always work if you're just too small and easy to bully. Also, good luck trying that when somebody is threatening to kill you.
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ParanoidObsessive posted...

One time I was getting mocked on the school bus by one consistent bully, but that day I happened to have a massive sinus headache, and pain has ALWAYS made me irritable as fuck. So after a moment of him just taunting me and trying to get my attention while I was trying to ignore him, I turned to him and just stared hate and told him in a very serious voice that if he didn't shut the fuck up in the next ten seconds, I was going to jam my thumbs into his eye sockets, slam him to the ground, and smash his head repeatedly into the floor until his skull cracked and brains started leaking out. Then I turned around and very deliberately started counting to ten under my breath. That kid never spoke another word to me again.

Nice!
If you can use just "craziness" and instill enough fear to be left alone w/o having to resort to getting physical, that's even better. Even if you decisively win a fight, you're probably taking damage too, and you don't know what will happen when it begins.
Genghis Khan was very wise about this, on a military strategy level. Both in how he brutalized those he did fight, and the spies he'd disperse to other cities to spread exaggerated tales about his cruelty. All of it to try and cow other places into surrendering w/o a fight, because needing to fight less often is always better.
It's the same concept here, w/ bullies.

ParanoidObsessive posted...

The real problem is, this probably isn't a viable tactic anymore, because these days if you pull that sort of thing off, YOU'LL be the one getting expelled and sent to mandatory psych counseling because they'll assume you're a potential school shooter threat and zero tolerance your ass.

Honestly, still worth it vs. the alternative of being bullied.
I did get detention once for fighting back after my bullies had spent 3/4 of the year tormenting me right in front of a teacher who did nothing about it, but had no problems giving me detention when I snapped.
But that was a small price to pay even though it was unfair. They left me alone after that, both in and out of class, and I caused such a scene apparently that the school pulled me out of the class for the rest of the year and had me do the assignments in the admin office area by myself. Which meant I could just do my work in peace and quiet, so...awesome!

No. I was that middle ground kid who fit in more or less with everyone in school and hung out with no one outside of school.

Enclave posted...

streamofthesky posted...

Yup.

Didn't stop till I fought back. Wish I had realized that was the only solution sooner.
I'd never recommend starting shit yourself. But if you do become the victim of yet another provocation/attack and the situation is right (if he's got 4 pals w/ him to join in for example, the situation is probably not right).... The key to fighting back is to:
a) fuck the concept of "fighting fair" or gentlemanly
b) use whatever is available to you...objects as weapons, your own nails, your teeth, whatever
c) Allow yourself "snap" as it's called, and be as berserk, loud, and aggressive as possible. Tap into all the festering anger from your treatment by bullies that you've bottled up.

The goal isn't just to win the fight, it's to get all the other bullies in school to fear you, because they think you're crazy. Then they'll leave you alone and look for an easier target. All it really takes is one dramatic outburst, and word will spread.

I assure you, it doesn't always work if you're just too small and easy to bully. Also, good luck trying that when somebody is threatening to kill you.

It worked for me.
I know the advice won't work for every person/situation. I think it will for most, though.

If you're in a really bad school, where kids have knives or even guns and are in actual gangs and shit.... It probably isn't the best approach, for example. I can only give advice based on my school experience, where the bullies are cowards deep-down and are just looking for easy targets to mess with.

Oh I get that, like I said once I was big enough to be able to back up standing up for myself it worked. Until then though, I was way too easy of pickings even though I fought back.
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Enclave posted...

Oh I get that, like I said once I was big enough to be able to back up standing up for myself it worked. Until then though, I was way too easy of pickings even though I fought back.

If you were just too small/weak, then it's unfortunate.
I was trying to stress fighting with ferocity over "fisticuffs" because too often the latter is how Hollywood depicts the nerd standing up to and overcoming the bully, and it's unrealistic and dangerous.
If a bully is picking on you, it means he thinks he can beat you in a fight. If he thought otherwise, he'd be going after someone else. He could just be wrong in his assessment, but more than likely the bully can win a straight up fight. You need to avoid a straight up fight. You have the advantage of surprise (he's not expecting you to fight back) and your sheer ferocity, and that's your only advantages. Hit first, try to to make it count, but even if it's a weak attack..follow up immediately. Don't pause, keep striking as much and as swiftly as possible.
And if you're crazed enough and at least make him bleed, even if you lose the fight he may well decide you're not "worth it" anymore.

Just my perspective. Definitely should assess your chances against a bully and not get into a fight you think you have no hope of winning.
EDIT: Getting bigger/stronger is good, too. Not mutually exclusive at all. Definitely worthwhile to at least develop a punch that'll actually stagger someone for a moment.

Absolutely I was it was boarder line criminal activity. This was all in elementary school. Yes, I had teachers and a principal who cared.
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Happy1912 posted...

Yes, I had teachers and a principal who cared.

Lucky you, in grade 7 my teacher spoke to the class saying if anybody was bullied to not be afraid to come talk to him about it. I did, he blamed me.
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Yes. I was 411 85lbs in 9th grade

But I liked fighting so it didnt bother me 1 bit
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I had one bully. He was only verbally abusive. I stood up to him with words once and he stopped bullying me, well, more like after that, every time he'd start to try to make fun of me, I'd just tell him to shut up and he would.
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Enclave posted...

Happy1912 posted...

Yes, I had teachers and a principal who cared.

Lucky you, in grade 7 my teacher spoke to the class saying if anybody was bullied to not be afraid to come talk to him about it. I did, he blamed me.

Thats sad. Really sad the teacher said dont be afraid to speak up but you did and the teacher shouldve showed more compassion towards you and dealt harshly with said bullying.
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I sincerely hope my daughter doesn't face any of the crap I had to deal with as a kid, it was rough.

Life is awesome now though. Good job, good friends, good family.
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I sued to protect the nerds from the bullies since I'm a badass. Now those bullies are my friends.
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