Board 8 > red shifter's top and bottom games of the decade

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Red Shifter
01/02/20 5:05:04 PM
#1:


I don't actually play a lot of games anymore so this is going to be a bad list.

top games:
  • Nintendo Labo Toy-Con 03 (Vehicle Kit) - It always amazes me how well Nintendo does at arcade-style vehicle games when they decide to make anything that isn't Mario Kart. This game was fun, but not substantial enough to be worth a full $69.99 (+$4.20 sales tax) and the storage space required for all the pieces. Fun fact: the Excite series still lives on through Nintendo Labo and the last 3D F-Zero game is almost old enough to vote.
  • Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night - Can you believe there's an eighth game in the Metroidvania series? I was so into it that even the garbage Switch version wasn't enough to make me hate it. Team Broadsword represent.
  • SpaceChem - This is the game that made me like puzzle games again. It's a programming game and is exceedingly difficult. Basically put Zachtronics on the map.
  • TIS-100 - Apparently I like the driest possible games, as long as they come from Zachtronics.
  • Baba is You - Great puzzle game. I don't want to imagine what kind of horrors are going to come out of having a steam workshop and level editor in 2020...
  • Snakebird - Apparently the only games I play for myself are puzzle games now. This one is super difficult.
  • La-Mulana 2 - I watch a lot of Twitch streams of La-Mulana, so I decided to pick this up for myself. It's not as good as the original (probably 20% of the game's puzzles use the same mechanic) but it's still good.


bottom games:
  • Tribes Ascend - They tried to make it pay2win, but skill beats equipment in Tribes so their monetization plan failed. Gave new meaning to the South Park quote "How do you kill that which has no life?". It was so bad that people made their own game called Midair...
  • Midair - ...which was also bad. They succeeded at making it look like it was pay2win, so everyone dropped it within days of release. The devs apparently only knew how to make "Light CTF" where everyone has the same weapons and the game has no Tribes-level complexity, so they should've made that, added matchmaking, and called it a day. At this point I accepted that I'm not playing a multiplayer FPS ever again.
  • Fortnight - I didn't play this, but it deserves to be talked about. If you support EGS then you support the 100 hour work weeks spent on Fortnight that helped put it on the map, among other shady business practices. Someone involved definitely sold their soul to the devil to get this game to be so popular.
  • Mario Kart 8 - I hate Mario Kart. This game is basically F-Zero minus anything to make it a fun experience. Putting item boxes on an F-Zero track is blasphemy of the highest order. This game personally offends because I couldn't find a Switch that didn't have this bundled with it when I was trying to get one.
  • Quantum Conundrum - I only got this so I could have a Genuine [Quad]wrangler in TF2. It has the worst disembodied voice in modern gaming (which you can thankfully turn off), ripped off its main concept from Chester (probably, I didn't play it), and generally just tried to be memey. I didn't expect to hate this game so much when it was over.


Here's to another decade of endless Mario Kart, exactly one racing game made by Nintendo that's good, not being able to play PC games because I'm not willing to install a storefront that can install Fortnight, and not actually playing games.

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It's F-Zero. F-ZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERO!
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