Current Events > How do you all feel about wedding registries/giving cash?

(+) Yeah! (+)

If I was getting married, I have a big discomfort with setting up a registry or asking for cash. Just something about it that I feel uncomfortable about.

Like, if they want to give stuff they can, but like setting up a registry or having the information on a wedding website. It's just weird to me
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Dont worry the woman wont be squeamish about it and you'll get free shit

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I just know if I'm gonna have one,I don't even want it advertised like on the invitations or anything. Just keep it low key as fuck
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Bump
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I'm attending my pal's wedding and I'm not giving him jack squat. I gave him enough financial advice (buy Link) and he has my number if he needs help learning about the field.

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Sad_Face posted...

I gave him enough financial advice (buy Link)

Leave me the fuck out of your buddy's marriage

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Depending on how well I know them, I'd possibly get the couple a wedding gift no problem. If it's expected though, fuck them and fuck that.

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wedding registries are obsolete. most people live together before they're married so they already have all their shit, plus the bride usually gets presents at the bridal shower anyway. at my wedding i think i received maybe 3 gifts, and that was from people who wanted to do that themselves.

most people should bring cash. you dont need to ask for it, it's kind of an unspoken social rule that you bring enough of a cash gift to at least cover your plate.

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Southernfatman posted...

Depending on how well I know them, I'd possibly get the couple a wedding gift no problem. If it's expected though, fuck them and fuck that.

What makes it expected? If it's mentioned in anyway? What if they have a registry but they mention that it's fully optional.

Romulox28 posted...

wedding registries are obsolete. most people live together before they're married so they already have all their shit, plus the bride usually gets presents at the bridal shower anyway. at my wedding i think i received maybe 3 gifts, and that was from people who wanted to do that themselves.

most people should bring cash. you dont need to ask for it, it's kind of an unspoken social rule that you bring enough of a cash gift to at least cover your plate.

Would having some type of money link or whatever on a website make giving cash easier? So it doesn't have to be at the wedding?

I know I have family members who would want to give something. And I'd just end up getting questions from them about how they can give or buy something. And I guess a registry would be good for those who don't like giving money?
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emblem boy posted...

Would having some type of money link or whatever on a website make giving cash easier? So it doesn't have to be at the wedding?

I know I have family members who would want to give something. And I'd just end up getting questions from them about how they can give or buy something. And I guess a registry would be good for those who don't like giving money?

having a website where you can get wired funds would be kind of tacky imo, every wedding ive ever been to just has a card box at the reception that people drop cards into.

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Romulox28 posted...

emblem boy posted...

Would having some type of money link or whatever on a website make giving cash easier? So it doesn't have to be at the wedding?

I know I have family members who would want to give something. And I'd just end up getting questions from them about how they can give or buy something. And I guess a registry would be good for those who don't like giving money?

having a website where you can get wired funds would be kind of tacky imo, every wedding ive ever been to just has a card box at the reception that people drop cards into.

That's how I feel as well. But it makes sense to have there be an option so it doesn't have to be cash, on the day
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I didn't feel bad at all. You spend a ton of money for one night for all those people. The least they can do is give you $50 or more.

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SquantoZ posted...

I didn't feel bad at all. You spend a ton of money for one night for all those people. The least they can do is give you $50 or more.

It's an ego thing for me. I don't like the idea of it looking like I'm asking
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emblem boy posted...

It's an ego thing for me. I don't like the idea of it looking like I'm asking

Then get over yourself lol. It's not just your wedding, it's your spouse's as well. And if you both are too awkward to graciously accept gifts, then don't have a wedding lol.

It's the universal standard to expect people to give you money to compensate you for including them at your giant celebration. Putting a gift table out isn't begging, it's just how weddings work. People will know what to do, and no one will think twice about it giving you cash or a check.

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You can have the option available without actually asking for anything. People know proper wedding etiquette. My wife worded it perfectly on our invitations. I can't remember what she said though :(

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SquantoZ posted...

You can have the option available without actually asking for anything. People know proper wedding etiquette. My wife worded it perfectly on our invitations. I can't remember what she said though :(

Remember!!

LostForest posted...

emblem boy posted...

It's an ego thing for me. I don't like the idea of it looking like I'm asking

Then get over yourself lol. It's not just your wedding, it's your spouse's as well. If you both are too awkward to graciously accept gifts, then don't have a wedding lol.

It's the universal standard to expect people to give you money to compensate you for including them at your giant celebration. Putting a gift table out isn't begging, it's just how weddings work. People will know what to do, and no one will think twice about it giving you cash or a check.

*Sigh*
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Bro I'm sorry if I came off as abrasive, but you're overthinking this way too much lol. Like I said, part of having a wedding is accepting things graciously from people. You have to get gifts. And you gotta write thank you cards after. It's just part of the process.

For me and my wife's invitations, we just had a line on our wedding website that said "Register Info: We are registered at Bed Bath & Beyond, and Target." with the links to each one.
We had a small gift table out near our cake table, with a sign that said "gifts". Like I said, people will know what to do.

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I feel like you should be able to get a refund for all of your expenses if the marriage lasts less than a year.

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No, you're fine. It's a me issue. I have no "logical" reason as to why I wouldn't have those various options. It just makes me uncomfortable.
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I was at a Turkish wedding

They announced how much each family/group gave at the end
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Here, chunk it out. It's really simple, you don't have to call attention to it. People who want to find it will find it. Most of our gifts were monetary, but then we still got some from the registry from our less wealthy friends/family, which is totally fair.



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SquantoZ posted...

I didn't feel bad at all. You spend a ton of money for one night for all those people. The least they can do is give you $50 or more.

I guess I want it to be more like "yo, just come through and party with us. Don't worry about anything else"
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it all comes full circle. your friends will get married and you'll give them cash. they give you cash now. it's just how it goes. don't be cheap either. whoever said $50 is completely misguided. $100 per guest is the expected minimum.

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Wedding registries are honestly done to the benefit of your guest. Your guest are going to give you a wedding gift. That's just part of tradition. The registry takes the guess work off of the your guest so they can get you something you want/need without asking you directly about it and also prevents like 12 of your guest from getting you a crock pot.

Not having a registry actually creates stress for your guest.

If you truly don't want gifts, plainly state so on the invite. You'll still get some though because people like giving gifts.

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Gheb posted...

Wedding registries are honestly done to the benefit of your guest. Your guest are going to give you a wedding gift. That's just part of tradition. The registry takes the guess work off of the your guest so they can get you something you want/need without asking you directly about it and also prevents like 12 of your guest from getting you a crock pot.

Not having a registry actually creates stress for your guest.

A registry and a website that allows for people to wire funds makes complete sense to me. Like you said, they only help the guests. It just feels weird
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IMHO it's wayyy more tacky and uncomfortable to explicitly say "Here is our PayPal. Please send us money here." on your website than to just put out a gift table and let people give you cards with money in it without you asking.


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LostForest posted...

IMHO it's wayyy more tacky and uncomfortable to explicitly say "Here is our PayPal. Please send us money here." on your website than to just put out a gift table and let people give you cards with money in it without you asking.

I think it's all tacky, but if we're gonna be tacky, might as well have it be convenient...?
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