Current Events > Would you date a cute girl with a past?

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Orlando_Jordan
08/27/20 10:11:32 PM
#1:


She's been with a lot of guys.

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Fenrimis
08/27/20 10:12:50 PM
#2:


Idgaf about a high body count but its usually a red flag of underlying emotional issues.

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AdrianBeterson
08/27/20 10:13:51 PM
#3:


That's too much of a black and white scenario. I'd need to know a whole lot more. I wouldn't date or dismiss someone based on one factor alone.

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uwnim
08/27/20 10:19:08 PM
#4:


I would be more disturbed if she did not exist before I met her.

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TheGreatGeno6
08/27/20 10:20:32 PM
#5:


I dont give a fuck how many guys a girl has been with because I'm not a puritanical moron

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cuttin_in_farm
08/27/20 10:22:26 PM
#6:


Again. Number of guys is irrelevant. Its number of guys in what time frame.

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AlisLandale
08/27/20 10:23:36 PM
#7:


Sonic sez...




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Wii_Shaker
08/27/20 10:27:24 PM
#8:


Yeah. I would.

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masticatingman
08/27/20 10:30:17 PM
#9:


I usually do since I like older/mature women. 40s/50s etc. Im used to an age gap of 15-20 years minimum so far. I simply dont care about their body count. Were humans, it doesnt matter.

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Guide
08/27/20 10:31:41 PM
#11:


I don't think it's bad in itself, but no. Possession is an important aspect for me.

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Null_Mime
08/27/20 10:34:01 PM
#12:


Nope. Psychology studies find that promiscuous women have either extreme difficulty with emotional pair-bonding, or are completely incapable of it.

I'm not much into the idea of casual dating, so if I'm entering a relationship, it's with the intention of it being more long term if I like her. So we already have a conflict of personal values on that front, plus her difficulty in forming a real, long-term emotional connection.

No thanks.

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ReignFury
08/27/20 10:34:57 PM
#13:


It never stopped me in the past but I dont date them for long, any woman who was a town bicycle is not a viable long term partner

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#14
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Orlando_Jordan
08/27/20 10:37:34 PM
#15:


Aeriis posted...
I'm wondering what CE considers to be a lot tbh
Most party girls have probably slept with at least 100 guys.

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#16
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AdrianBeterson
08/27/20 10:44:19 PM
#17:


Null_Mime posted...
Nope. Psychology studies find that promiscuous women have either extreme difficulty with emotional pair-bonding, or are completely incapable of it.

I'm not much into the idea of casual dating, so if I'm entering a relationship, it's with the intention of it being more long term if I like her. So we already have a conflict of personal values on that front, plus her difficulty in forming a real, long-term emotional connection.

No thanks.
Source on these studies?

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JOSGABRIEL
08/27/20 10:55:37 PM
#18:


Yeah. The past around a person shouldn't influence the way that person is in the current present.

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pfh1001
08/27/20 10:59:14 PM
#19:


Nope.
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DespondentDeity
08/27/20 11:01:43 PM
#20:


It might come up naturally but I wouldn't ask about how many partners someone has had. I don't think it's relevant, I also think it's unfair to judge someone based on it.

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Null_Mime
08/27/20 11:08:05 PM
#21:


AdrianBeterson posted...
Source on these studies?

https://ifstudies.org/blog/counterintuitive-trends-in-the-link-between-premarital-sex-and-marital-stability/

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5815947/

Someone TLDR's it here in this reddit page.

https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6px01x/why_does_a_high_female_ncount_damage_pair_bonding/

It has to do with the affect of frequent, casual sex on a woman's oxytocin receptors.
The hormone oxytocin, which is produced during sex, increases levels of empathy and bonding. Women produce more oxytocin during sex than men, which means they are more likely to let their guard down and fall in love with a man after sex.
Oxytocin receptors in the central nervous system regulate the affect of oxytocin on emotions. Oxytocin is like a drug. A woman's first experience with post coital release of oxytocin has a powerful, lasting impact. Anyone who has bedded a virgin or very low N count girl can attest to this. She will attach to you like a barnacle to a ship.
Like drug addicts, a high N count woman will need more and more sex to get a satisfactory oxytocin high and at some point her receptors will burn out and she'll likely never be able to experience the post coital warm and fuzzies that bond her to her partner.


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Garlands_Soul
08/27/20 11:12:00 PM
#22:


I wouldn't care if I liked the girl and thought we were a good fit

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NeoShadowhen
08/27/20 11:15:46 PM
#23:


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Guide
08/27/20 11:19:13 PM
#24:


The studies are legitimate, though it always sets an incelly red flag off when someone brings it up.

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Bandit_Keith
08/27/20 11:22:40 PM
#25:


NeoShadowhen posted...
*record scratch*

thats some real shit, man.

The Redpiller opinion doesn't link up with the conclusion of the study though.
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AdrianBeterson
08/27/20 11:23:07 PM
#26:


Null_Mime posted...
https://ifstudies.org/blog/counterintuitive-trends-in-the-link-between-premarital-sex-and-marital-stability/

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5815947/

Someone TLDR's it here in this reddit page.

https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6px01x/why_does_a_high_female_ncount_damage_pair_bonding/
FYI your first source is a heavy right wing, conservative biased source with a strong Christian backing. Their research is NOT objective and highly biased by their religious and political values.

Your second source and reddit source aren't even talking about the same paper. What is the reddit comment's source? The paper you linked talks about the association between oxytocin and parental bonding and loss in voles. It even makes this statement, "In contrast, in humans there is less evidence that the OT system plays a role in pair bond formation (e.g., Schneiderman et al. 2012), but the brain OT system does seem to be important for its maintenance".

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Null_Mime
08/27/20 11:30:36 PM
#27:


AdrianBeterson posted...
FYI your first source is a heavy right wing, conservative biased source with a strong Christian backing. Their research is NOT objective and highly biased by their religious and political values.

Your second source and reddit source aren't even talking about the same paper. What is the reddit comment's source? The paper you linked talks about the association between oxytocin and parental bonding and loss in voles. It even makes this statement, "In contrast, in humans there is less evidence that the OT system plays a role in pair bond formation (e.g., Schneiderman et al. 2012), but the brain OT system does seem to be important for its maintenance".

Oh, sorry, must have ctrl copied the wrong page.

https://www.medinstitute.org/articles/pair-bonding-and-the-brain/

They kinda of sum it up similarly to the reddit post at the end. They also mention the vole study.


However, when an individual choses to engage in casual sex, breaking bond after bond with each new sexual partner, the brain forms a new synaptic map of one-night stands. This pattern becomes the new normal for the individual. When and if the individual later desires to find a more permanent partner, the brain mapping will have to be overcome, making a permanent bond more difficult to achieve. Often the individual is not aware that the brain has adapted to the behavior pattern and he/she begins to think, Thats just the way I am, further reinforcing the pattern. In conclusion, research on bonding continues to support previous research showing that the brain is strongly influenced by sexual behaviors. Dopamine pathways as well as oxytocin and vasopressin and other neural systems are important factors in the formation of pair-bonds. When a person engages in sexual behavior there are consequences above and beyond the possibility of unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Bonding with a sexual partner is one of those results.

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Mr_Rian
08/27/20 11:36:47 PM
#28:


Null_Mime posted...
Oh, sorry, must have ctrl copied the wrong page.

https://www.medinstitute.org/articles/pair-bonding-and-the-brain/

They kinda of sum it up similarly to the reddit post at the end. They also mention the vole study.

I'm not going to completely disregard this, but I'd have to do way more research, because that is a right-wing super biased abstinence-only organization. So I'd double and triple check anything that comes out of there.
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DP3
08/27/20 11:39:46 PM
#29:


ITT: Slut shaming
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Guide
08/27/20 11:41:56 PM
#30:


Mr_Rian posted...
I'm not going to completely disregard this, but I'd have to do way more research, because that is a right-wing super biased abstinence-only organization. So I'd double and triple check anything that comes out of there.

You know, this is really making me second guess what I've come across. I'll have to do some homework, too.

@Null_Mime Were you aware of the source before posting that link?

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DP3
08/27/20 11:44:53 PM
#31:


Women have been sexually repressed for thousands of years thanks to religion. If girls want to be free in an era that is just now allowing them to do so, it's pretty shitty to judge them as being emotionally damaged goods.

The reality is that the average girl is going to have way more sexual experience than the average man. Deal.
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ReignFury
08/27/20 11:45:20 PM
#32:


DP3 posted...
ITT: Slut shaming

Slut observation

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AdrianBeterson
08/27/20 11:46:47 PM
#33:


Null_Mime posted...
Oh, sorry, must have ctrl copied the wrong page.

https://www.medinstitute.org/articles/pair-bonding-and-the-brain/

They kinda of sum it up similarly to the reddit post at the end. They also mention the vole study.
Once again, right-wing bias. What's nice is this source at least tries to be objective as opposed to the other one you linked.

Problem with this study as well is the concept of pair-bonding is far more complex than hormones, and we simply don't know. Even this source makes reach assumptions based on only 4 sources, one of which I already said asserts that human pathways differ from voles. There have yet to be any major randomized control trials on this topic.

Making broad assumptions that "woman had a lot of sex, therefore she cannot pair-bond" is not only unfair, but it does not have any legitimate scientific backing. If it's your personal preference that a woman is a virgin or has not had a lot of sex, then that's fine. But don't go around claiming it as a scientific fact or even a legitimate theory when there aren't proper studies examining it.

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Null_Mime
08/27/20 11:47:25 PM
#34:


Guide posted...
You know, this is really making me second guess what I've come across. I'll have to do some homework, too.

@Null_Mime Were you aware of the source before posting that link?

Not really. I came across it in that reddit thread. It was one of the first things that came up when I heard that promiscuous women have trouble pair-bonding and googled stuff about it.

Found the other science studies after that.

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Guide
08/27/20 11:49:17 PM
#35:


Eh, that's better than knowingly linking to 'em. Always important to check sources though.

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Twelf
08/27/20 11:49:22 PM
#36:


Needs more context.

I'm not long-term dating someone I have fundamentally different views on intimacy from.
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Twelf
08/27/20 11:56:33 PM
#37:


Orlando_Jordan posted...

Most party girls have probably slept with at least 100 guys.

Well then no, we're not compatible.

I'm the opposite of a party guy. There's no common ground there.
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Null_Mime
08/28/20 12:16:32 AM
#38:


Guide posted...
Eh, that's better than knowingly linking to 'em. Always important to check sources though.


Fair enough. I'm certainly not a person who believes in no sex before marriage, especially for religious reasons.

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The_Creep_2020
08/28/20 12:18:05 AM
#39:


I dated a girl for 18 months who claimed to have slept with 70+ people.

That was fine, but the mind games and psychological abuse were not.

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Dark_SilverX
08/28/20 12:18:47 AM
#40:


friends with benefits only

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PMarth2002
08/28/20 12:19:28 AM
#41:


Yeah. I don't know why anyone cares about how many girls a guy is with before you start going out.

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Nasty_Nitro
08/28/20 1:20:13 AM
#43:


Its not about the actual body count because lets keep it funky most women even average looking ones have atleast 40 bodies. A sexy skinny chick by age 27 might be in triple digits. Whats important is do you know any of the guys who busted her down? Even worse do you know 2 guys who got in there like swim wear? If so itsa a no.

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ReignFury
08/28/20 1:34:03 AM
#44:


Nasty_Nitro posted...
Its not about the actual body count because lets keep it funky most women even average looking ones have atleast 40 bodies. A sexy skinny chick by age 27 might be in triple digits. Whats important is do you know any of the guys who busted her down? Even worse do you know 2 guys who got in there like swim wear? If so itsa a no.

Those women ride the dick carousel for 10 years then become jaded and desperate when they realize its just fuckboys left, and nobody wants to marry a used up hag and raise some other dudes kids. They are all over tinder.

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The_Creep_2020
08/28/20 1:34:55 AM
#45:


ReignFury posted...
Those women ride the dick carousel for 10 years then become jaded and desperate when they realize its just fuckboys left, and nobody wants to marry a used up hag and raise some other dudes kids. They are all over tinder.

Uhh dude, I dont want to make you feel embarrassed or anything, but your Incel is showing.


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ReignFury
08/28/20 2:04:16 AM
#46:


The_Creep_2020 posted...
Uhh dude, I dont want to make you feel embarrassed or anything, but your Incel is showing.

Oh man, my wife is going to be shocked

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Blue_School
08/28/20 2:06:03 AM
#47:


Not interested in loose women.

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The_Creep_2020
08/28/20 2:08:49 AM
#48:


ReignFury posted...
Oh man, my wife is going to be shocked

But is she *really*?

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ReignFury
08/28/20 2:15:43 AM
#49:


The_Creep_2020 posted...
But is she *really*?

34 and married with an 11 year old daughter. My best friend got divorced recently so I'm hearing all about the desperate single moms and the dumb shit they write on tinder

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