Current Events > At night, when I close my eyes I get extremely graphic visions

(+) Yeah! (+)

This is new as of two weeks ago. And scary

Let me preface this by saying Im not suicidal. But lately, with increasing frequency, I am getting visions of my body swinging from a rope, or of me putting a gun in my mouth and shooting, or other ways of ending it

I should probably make an appointment to see my therapist. Ive always had intrusive thoughts but lately its been more like visions..

WHY

blogfaqs

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Harpie posted...

I should probably make an appointment to see my therapist.

Intrusive thoughts getting worse is a good reason to check in.

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Dark spirits.

Burn some incense and recite any prayers you can get behind.

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wbloechel posted...

That's not normal, yeah you should address this.

>.>

Im worried that these could be considered hallucinations. Before I made this topic, I was going through apartment listings on craigslist and I kept seeing my body hanging from light fixtures in the photos, or me bleeding out in the bathroom

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wbloechel posted...

That's not normal, yeah you should address this.

This. Wishing you all the best <3
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AldousIsDead posted...

Intrusive thoughts getting worse is a good reason to check in.

I havent seen her in nearly six months, shes gonna have to catch up on a lot lmao

Ill make the appointment tomorrow morning I think

Wii_Shaker posted...

Dark spirits.

Burn some incense and recite any prayers you can get behind.

Maybe I can ask my roommate, shes a lot more spiritual than I am. Who knows it might work :P

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teep_ posted...

This. Wishing you all the best <3

Thanks teep <3

I like the username change btw

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I'm not going to pretend to understand where you are coming from or even attempt to give advice, but I can tell you that I recently quit drinking, cold turkey after being a super heavy drinker for years. Due to me not weening off, and stopping suddenly, I had a bit of delirium set in, and I was having delusions, hallucinations that were so damn real and were terrifying. A lot of them were real dark, and I woke up asking my wife what happened and she had no idea what I was talking about. I believed it was happening, as it happened, and it was driving me nuts and I slept like 4 hours across 5 nights total.

My wife's mother is an RN and I was straight with her, told her I was quitting drinking after being a severe alcoholic for years, and what I was experiencing. She suggested I take a Gaba supplement and start drinking Kava tea twice a day. It legitimately eased my mind a lot, chilled out a lot of the delusions I was having, and finally got a steady night of sleep as a result. I'm not saying it will help you at all, but it was very successful with what I was going through and helped me recover from all the withdrawls which is now 10 days later.

See a doctor, get professional help, but in the meantime maybe this will at least help ease up your mind a little bit, help you relax and maybe get some sleep. It's only a suggestion because it worked for me, both items can be found on Amazon for pretty cheap, i'm sure your grocery store carries Kava tea also.

Hoping for the best for you.

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This kind of thing used to happen to me when I was younger. After a while it became something I enjoyed. It's somewhat unsettling remembering that mindset these days; I had forgotten about it until recently.

But yeah, I know what you mean in terms of involuntary suicidal imagery. It happened back at a time where I'm pretty sure I was depressed (high school, not diagnosed just suspected).

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imo why is not as important question as whether you can cope with them or find something to help you cope

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I had a near lifelong problem with suicidal ideation and intrusive thoughts like this, to the point that it was just a routine part of my daily mental grind. It always seemed to be in balance though, never appearing to be quite as alarming to me as others thought it to be. Then one day, it stopped being all in my head and I found myself in a pretty dicey situation I'm glad to have made it out of.

Good job on having the awareness to get help with it and good luck.

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Harpie posted...

teep_ posted...

This. Wishing you all the best <3

Thanks teep <3

I like the username change btw

Thanks! Unfortunately the name without the underscore was taken
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Maybe you have parasite

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Dissociating or otherwise having hallucinations is pretty bad, you should definitely try and see a professional over it unless it's just like, 2 am dissociating playing a game and coming back to around 4-5 and you gained 60 levels.

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that's intense buddy. also kind of gnarly.

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when i did psychedelics for the first time
I tried to go to sleep that night

keep seeing faces of people but without skin

glad thats over with and just a distant memory

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I'm really sorry you are having to go something that feels so surreal but in your face. I'm glad you are planning to see your therapy again (a lot of people would pull further away) though I wonder if medication would be more helpful (as it is generally more effective at changing overrall mood and decreasing these type of intrusive thoughts). I don't know all the particulars of your life right now but it could be the product of lots of smaller stresses/ traumas...
Either way I'm glad you are being honest about it!

Not to come of as rude but it sounds like you should commit yourself for your own safety. Thoughts of hurting yourself are bad enough but it sounds more like you're fantasizing about it

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Please do schedule an appointment

You're undeserving of that

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are they fantasies that you imagine in vivid detail or full on visual hallucinations taking on full image instead of darkness when closing your eyes?
latter is a very bad thing and worth tackling while you are still lucid if the case.

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I completely agree you should talk to someone about it. But I also strongly advise against posting stuff like this here because some moderator might see you was a suicide threat and lock your account

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That only happened to me after smoking weed or taking hallucinogens.

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Does it trigger anxiety? Seems like something that could cause an anxiety attack.

Also, could it be linked to medication?

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MabusIncarnate posted...

I'm not going to pretend to understand where you are coming from or even attempt to give advice, but I can tell you that I recently quit drinking, cold turkey after being a super heavy drinker for years. Due to me not weening off, and stopping suddenly, I had a bit of delirium set in, and I was having delusions, hallucinations that were so damn real and were terrifying. A lot of them were real dark, and I woke up asking my wife what happened and she had no idea what I was talking about. I believed it was happening, as it happened, and it was driving me nuts and I slept like 4 hours across 5 nights total.

My wife's mother is an RN and I was straight with her, told her I was quitting drinking after being a severe alcoholic for years, and what I was experiencing. She suggested I take a Gaba supplement and start drinking Kava tea twice a day. It legitimately eased my mind a lot, chilled out a lot of the delusions I was having, and finally got a steady night of sleep as a result. I'm not saying it will help you at all, but it was very successful with what I was going through and helped me recover from all the withdrawls which is now 10 days later.

See a doctor, get professional help, but in the meantime maybe this will at least help ease up your mind a little bit, help you relax and maybe get some sleep. It's only a suggestion because it worked for me, both items can be found on Amazon for pretty cheap, i'm sure your grocery store carries Kava tea also.

Hoping for the best for you.

These two things, right? If so Ill try out the supplements. Its been getting difficult to fall asleep because I cant keep the thoughts out of my head. I can almost feel whatever Im thinking of too, especially the slicing ones

Thank you Mabus. Good luck on quitting cold turkey, thats honestly amazing. Your MIL is also a saint for recommending those things too. Its a wonder they made such a large difference considering the intensity of your delusions

Jabodie posted...

This kind of thing used to happen to me when I was younger. After a while it became something I enjoyed. It's somewhat unsettling remembering that mindset these days; I had forgotten about it until recently.

But yeah, I know what you mean in terms of involuntary suicidal imagery. It happened back at a time where I'm pretty sure I was depressed (high school, not diagnosed just suspected).

Honestly its getting there for me too. At first, I tried really hard to fight off the thoughts and visions. Now, I sometimes lean into them and continue to fantasize.

Im glad its over for you. Hopefully it will be for me too

josifrees posted...

imo why is not as important question as whether you can cope with them or find something to help you cope

I think I can cope fine, I dont get distressed by them. Its concerning but not something I freak out about

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Thank you

I agree

teep_ posted...

Thanks! Unfortunately the name without the underscore was taken

WHO is this imposter
@teep
I cant even @ them wow

edit: jk apparently I can @ them

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Yes, that's exactly what I have, same brands and everything. I double up the tea bags, it doesn't taste amazing or anything, but it's fine with honey and a bit of milk or cream. Hopefully it helps you.

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gunplagirl posted...

Dissociating or otherwise having hallucinations is pretty bad, you should definitely try and see a professional over it unless it's just like, 2 am dissociating playing a game and coming back to around 4-5 and you gained 60 levels.

Lmaooo god thats me with youtube. I start watching at like 11pm and next thing I know Im watching an anacondas in Florida documentary and its 4am

berlyman101 posted...

that's intense buddy. also kind of gnarly.

Yeah, its never been this bad before..

armandro posted...

when i did psychedelics for the first time
I tried to go to sleep that night

keep seeing faces of people but without skin

glad thats over with and just a distant memory

God that sucks. Ive heard of others irl who had similar first time experiences with psychedelics. Ill stick to the green stuff I think :p

CouldBeAnAlt posted...

Not to come of as rude but it sounds like you should commit yourself for your own safety. Thoughts of hurting yourself are bad enough but it sounds more like you're fantasizing about it

Its not rude, but I think that committing myself is overkill at the moment. While I do fantasize, I am not in a place where I think that I will do any of these things

Back_Stabbath posted...

are they fantasies that you imagine in vivid detail or full on visual hallucinations taking on full image instead of darkness when closing your eyes?
latter is a very bad thing and worth tackling while you are still lucid if the case.

Fantasies in full detail for the most part. The visions are rarer, but they also started only a few days ago. I made this topic because of the latter >.>

Im not sure if theyre hallucinations though. Theyre more like 5-6 second scenes that flash one after the other, and if I open my eyes they stop instantly.

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Lost_All_Senses posted...

Does it trigger anxiety? Seems like something that could cause an anxiety attack.

Also, could it be linked to medication?

No, it surprisingly elicits very little emotion from me unless I lean into it. Which isnt often

Doubt its medication, as I havent made any changes in over 6 months. Its more likely to be stress.

MabusIncarnate posted...

Yes, that's exactly what I have, same brands and everything. I double up the tea bags, it doesn't taste amazing or anything, but it's fine with honey and a bit of milk or cream. Hopefully it helps you.

Oh welp that makes it easy. Ill give it a go, its cheap so why not
thank you ^^


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Harpie posted...

No, it surprisingly elicits very little emotion from me unless I lean into it. Which isnt often

So you have some dominance over your thoughts. That's what's up. I have some crazy thoughts too, but I just notify myself that that's not who I am and that it's proven by my track record. At this point a lot of it is basically swatting a fly.

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