Current Events > JK Rowling is the reason I work out

(+) Yeah! (+)

I have this fantasy(or more a dream) where we start talking at a Harry Potter convention afterparty or something like that with THE JK Rowling. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do, I skirt around the question, as I work at Pizza Hut. Instead, I say I think she's doing a great job as a writer. She laughs. I get my drink.

"Well, see ya," I say casually and walk away. But see, I've got her attention now. How many people voluntarily leave a conversation with JK Rowling? She touches her neck as she watches me leave.

Later, as the night drags on and the coterie of fat neckbeards grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.

"Got a spare?" she asks.

"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles.

"Conversation with me, duh."

I chuckle.

"What's so funny?" she protests.

"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of arguing on twitter?"

"You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter.

"What would you do if you weren't trying to deal with all the constant TERF stuff?" I ask.

"I don't know, teaching, I think."

"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"

"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?"

"Hogwarts," I say.

"Oh wow. That's lovely."

"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything there is to my liking."

"What could possibly be not to your liking in the Wizarding World of Harry Potter?" She inquires.

"The death eaters." I tell her. "They're irritating, completely unintelligent, they're everywhere, and they are badly written."

Then I wake up. Always right before I hear what she says.

neat

Lmao classic

So when is the part where you put your wand in her sorting hat

Lmao

Shigeru Miyamoto is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at a Nintendo Direct afterparty. We exchange a few pleasantries. He asks what I do. I say I loved Wii Music. He laughs. I get my drink.

"Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got his attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Shigeru Miyamoto? He touches his neck as he watches me leave.

Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, he finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.

"" he asks.

"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand him one of my little white ladies. He smiles.

"duh"

I laugh.

"" he protests.

"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of making video games?"

"" he says, lighting his cigarette and handing me back the lighter.

"What would you do if you weren't a game designer?" I ask.

""

"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"

"" he says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. ""

"Shifting Sand Land," I say.

""

"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking."

"" he inquires.

"I don't like levels with sand," I tell him. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."

^That sounds extremely similar to mine!

the sballen one is better

MedeaLysistrata posted...

the sballen one is better

A lot of my fantasies are the same.

Bump.

Funny

I wish you didn't smoke but otherwise 10/10, I really approve!

Noumas posted...

I wish you didn't smoke but otherwise 10/10, I really approve!

Look, it's a fantasy. Fantasy smokes aren't the same as real ones!

Slayer_22 posted...

"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes,

hmm

hmmmmmmm

WingsOfGood posted...

hmm

hmmmmmmm

I still don't know what she meant by that.

It haunts my every waking moment. One day I'll ask her and find out.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/2/0/7/AAfSRzAAEKKf.jpg

I want to write my own series of books about wizards and magic and all that other Harry Potter shit and make it like really similar but better and just change names and details and stuff enough to not have it be plagiarism like maybe I'd call it "Gary Zotter" or something like that and have the magic school be called "Frogfarts." I think that would be pretty awesome.

FigureOfSpeech posted...

I want to write my own series of books about wizards and magic and all that other Harry Potter shit and make it like really similar but better and just change names and details and stuff enough to not have it be plagiarism like maybe I'd call it "Gary Zotter" or something like that and have the magic school be called "Frogfarts." I think that would be pretty awesome.

Just market it as very similar to Harry Potter but the author is not insufferable or bigotted and it might go far tbh.

WingsOfGood posted...

Just market it as very similar to Harry Potter but the author is not insufferable or bigotted and it might go far tbh.

That's possible but it's too stupid of an idea for me to undertake personally. If I was serious, I'd try to just contract it to a ghost writer or some shit lol. I don't have the patience to try and make a cheap knock off myself even if the anti-bigot angle could actually make it turn into something.

Great topic

lol

VampireCoyote posted...

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/2/0/7/AAfSRzAAEKKf.jpg

Look, the time felt right, ok?

^dude wtf?

What was it?

NeonTentacles posted...

What was it?

I'd say it was smut but that would be too kind. I don't really want to get modded.

Was it Rowling nudes or something? >_>

NeonTentacles posted...

Was it Rowling nudes or something? >_>

Oh, no, no, God no.

Ok I'll look past it this time but part 2 coming out when

Noumas posted...

Ok I'll look past it this time but part 2 coming out when

When I dream a part 2. It's in production probably.

You want to be fit for the culture wars?