Current Events > Promotion offered to someone else... feels bad, man.

(+) Yeah! (+)

Bob (fake name) and I were both in the same group (say A). The group has two distinct work categories (say i and ii). We were both top performers for (i), and we supported each other. The other side of the group (ii) already has a lead position; the side of the group (i) that Bob and I worked in did not.

I asked my manager to create a lead role for (i), and allow myself and Bob to apply for it. He rejected. Soon after, I got an opportunity from a different group (say B) to be their lead. I went back to the A manager and asked again, telling him Im going to take my B opportunity if not. He said he prefers having just one lead (the one for topic i, and not doing anything with topic iI), and that his hands were tied (that even his manager wont approve such a change); so I took the lead position in group B.

Not even a year later, Bob is in the same boat hes tired of acting as the lead but not getting paid nor recognized with a title. He got a lead opportunity at a different group (say C), and went to As manager with the same ultimatum. This time, As manager actually conceded and said he will make a new lead position for Bob to apply to.

Fast forward a few weeks, and sure enough, a new lead position is posted for A (specific for ii topic), and Bob applies (I did not apply). Today, I learned that he got the lead position (which was a no brainer).

Bob thanked me and apologized how all this turned out, specifically that if I hadnt started these discussions a few months ago with As manager and if I didnt act on leaving, the lead position in A wouldnt have happened and he wouldnt be where he is now.

While Im happy about Bobs promotion, I actually feel pretty bad about this, as in Im not worth keeping (in the eyes of group A), and they didnt even bother to try but for Bob, theyre giving him everything he wanted. Not sure how I can continue on as if nothing happened, especially because our two groups regularly work together.

/blogfaqs

The couldn't afford to lose both you and bob

your co-workers are not family. you shouldn't care too much about your co-worker's opinions of you. as long as they are not harassing you or actively going after you, just tell them to fuck off

Doesnt sound like they feel you werent worth keeping, but that you leaving was a wake up call

greenjeans posted...

The couldn't afford to lose both you and bob

TheGoldenEel posted...

Doesnt sound like they feel you werent worth keeping, but that you leaving was a wake up call

Thats good perspective. Thank you for that.

TheGoldenEel posted...

Doesnt sound like they feel you werent worth keeping, but that you leaving was a wake up call

more this tbh

TheGoldenEel posted...

Doesnt sound like they feel you werent worth keeping, but that you leaving was a wake up call

This.

You gave them an ultimatum and acted on it, so they knew if Bob did the same thing they'd lose 2 of their top people in just a few months of each other, so caved in to Bob.

You did kinda pave the way for Bob to get the postition it sounds like, but don't hold it against Bob if ya'll were otherwise cool. That's on the company for underestimating you when you first gave the intiial ultimatum.

JKwaffle posted...

This.

You gave them an ultimatum and acted on it, so they knew if Bob did the same thing they'd lose 2 of their top people in just a few months of each other, so caved in to Bob.

You did kinda pave the way for Bob to get the postition it sounds like, but don't hold it against Bob if ya'll were otherwise cool. That's on the company for underestimating you when you first gave the intiial ultimatum.

Thank you for that perspective. I am happy for Bob, and have nothing against him.

https://youtu.be/xoymUe6YDG8