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Current Events > Your reaction: You come home to find William Howard Taft stuck in your bathtub.

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UnfairRepresent
09/05/23 9:08:24 PM
#1:


You come home exhausted after a long day at work work one evening and hear strange noises coming from your bathroom.

Curiosity gets the best of you and you open the door to find President Taft in your bathtub. He's groaning and thrashing aroud, splashing water in all directions but he is totally stuck.

He looks at you and says "Faith! It is wonderful to finally see some relief. Please good sir you must help me at once. I've been fouled in this infernal contraption for.... good gracious, it must be hours by now!"

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/0/5/0/AAZiH8AAE0Hi.jpg

It's clear he can't get out on his own.

How do you react?
What do you do?

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#2
Post #2 was unavailable or deleted.
UnfairRepresent
09/06/23 7:06:13 AM
#3:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Gotta work on getting him out the bath

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Dreepapult
09/06/23 7:07:29 AM
#4:


First presidential campaign ran from the bathtub

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SiO4
09/06/23 11:04:03 AM
#5:


.

Eureka I found him!!

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Serious_Cat
09/06/23 11:09:04 AM
#6:


I'd wonder where the bathtub came from. And also where William Howard Taft came from.

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uwnim
09/06/23 11:12:43 AM
#7:


I have the President and Chief Justice William Howard Taft in my bathtub?

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Were_Wyrm
09/06/23 11:17:48 AM
#8:


To CE!

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Avirosb
09/06/23 11:19:23 AM
#9:


They say this cat Taft is a bad mother

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UnfairRepresent
09/06/23 11:39:39 AM
#10:


Serious_Cat posted...
I'd wonder where the bathtub came from. And also where William Howard Taft came from.
William Howard Taft was born September 15, 1857, in Cincinnati, Ohio, to Alphonso Taft and Louise Torrey. The Taft family was not wealthy, living in a modest home in the suburb of Mount Auburn

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MedeaLysistrata
09/07/23 2:59:39 PM
#11:


I don't want no wwi plumbing issues

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updated 5/22/2023
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DementedDurian
09/07/23 3:16:19 PM
#12:


I would keep him there and poke him with a long stick.

And who the fuck knows about Taft outside of the fact he really did get stuck in the tub?

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Bass
09/07/23 3:23:36 PM
#13:


DementedDurian posted...
I would keep him there and poke him with a long stick.

And who the fuck knows about Taft outside of the fact he really did get stuck in the tub?
I mainly know him for pissing off Teddy enough to get him to run as a third party candidate.

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Questionmarktarius
09/07/23 3:26:49 PM
#14:


UnfairRepresent posted...
William Howard Taft was born September 15, 1857, in Cincinnati, Ohio, to Alphonso Taft and Louise Torrey. The Taft family was not wealthy, living in a modest home in the suburb of Mount Auburn
Note that Taft has lost a lot of weight since then.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/4/4/1/AAEhCpAAE0dR.jpg
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ellis123
09/07/23 3:27:54 PM
#15:


Finish my piss and close the door behind me.

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sfcalimari
09/07/23 3:49:38 PM
#16:


Work work

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"Tether even a roasted chicken."
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UnholyMudcrab
09/07/23 3:58:12 PM
#17:


DementedDurian posted...
I would keep him there and poke him with a long stick.

And who the fuck knows about Taft outside of the fact he really did get stuck in the tub?
Taft never actually got stuck in a bathtub.

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Gobstoppers12
09/07/23 3:59:39 PM
#18:


Close the door and burn the house down, it's clearly haunted.

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Prestoff
09/07/23 4:00:34 PM
#19:


Shake that Lafty Tafty

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Shotgunnova
09/07/23 4:43:23 PM
#20:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAOCw72yzII

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mercurydude
09/07/23 5:13:51 PM
#21:


"WELL, somebody's certainly making themselves at home after giving me the silent treatment on the Ouija board for six months now. Let's see how YOU like it!"

And then I slam the door on the bastard.

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MedeaLysistrata
09/08/23 4:32:55 AM
#22:


Taft's final word is likely something you like

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updated 5/22/2023
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UnfairRepresent
09/08/23 12:37:49 PM
#23:


DementedDurian posted...
I would keep him there and poke him with a long stick.

And who the fuck knows about Taft outside of the fact he really did get stuck in the tub?
He didn't really get stuck in the tub doe

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uwnim
09/08/23 12:41:32 PM
#24:


Anyways Id probably call 911 and say a fat guy who claims to be William Howard Taft, you know the former President and Chief Justice Taft, is stuck in my bath tub. Can you send someone over to help get him out?

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FolkenRawr
09/08/23 12:45:23 PM
#25:


I'm on the third floor of an old, shitty building. I'm alerting my neighbors. They're pretty cool people.

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