Current Events > Would you support someone being a poser, fake, or fraud just to fit in?

(+) Yeah! (+)

with other people in order to make friends?

the wife wants our son to be someone hes not and be into interests that most kids like but. I dont know if I support teaching him to be a fraud

especially considering that some fans of the NBA, for example, will quiz you and check your legitimacy and expose you as a fraud fast if you dont know your shit and youre pretending to fit in

I dont know id rather someone be their own person even if their interests are niche or in the words of a basic woman. weird

Posers are trash

Irony posted...

Posers are trash

I always said this yet people keep telling me that everyone needs to have normal interests so that you can fit in with others

Like if everybody likes Steph Curry and the Warriors, you like him too, to go with the crowd

Heres some lyrics from a poser band

You can't be something you're not
Be yourself by yourself, stay away from me
A lesson learned in life
Known from the dawn of time

AzNDarkSamurai posted...

I always said this yet people keep telling me that everyone needs to have normal interests so that you can fit in with others

Like if everybody likes Steph Curry and the Warriors, you like him too, to go with the crowd

This post raises a few questions.

What "non-normal" interests are apparently being held? Knowing that will help guide an answer.

People figure out posers pretty quickly, and what's the point of "fitting in" if you don't actually fit in?

StealThisSheen posted...

This post raises a few questions.

What "non-normal" interests are apparently being held? Knowing that will help guide an answer.

The little guy is interested in things like street names, shopping carts (no idea why), buses, and cars

the wife is trying to get him to like normal boy interests like ninjas, karate, Pokemon, video games, sports on TV, etc.

IceCreamOnStero posted...

People figure out posers pretty quickly, and what's the point of "fitting in" if you don't actually fit in?

To try and be like everyone else so nobody thinks youre weird and theyd actually want to be friends with you?

If they have no outright interest, no. They probably have no especial fondness or care for the topic, so they would likely just parrot others and offer nothing of value to others nor gain anything of value since they have no interest in the topic.
If they have an interest, and arent doing it for likes, absolutely. Everyone has to start somewhere.
If theyre doing it for the likes and like, yes and no. Yes because they like it, but no because Im a hater.
If theyre doing it for likes and dont like it, no. Fuck outta here.

AzNDarkSamurai posted...

The little guy is interested in things like street names, shopping carts (no idea why), buses, and cars

the wife is trying to get him to like normal boy interests like ninjas, karate, Pokemon, video games, sports on TV, etc.

Is this a case where he has explored such things, like ninjas, Pokemon, video games, etc., and has no interest, or is it a case where he just... Hasn't explored those things, at all? I only ask because the interests you present sound like they may be interests based on just... Not having much else to become interested in. If that's not the case, then, yeah, things are different.

Nothing wrong with faking it till you make it.

^sure but at least know your shit if you want to pretend

Yeah i would to a certain degree.

The "just be yourself" attitude is the reason why we got so many assholes who thinks they're better than everyone else. Refused to fit in and think society has to fit to them instead.

bump

My biggest regret in high school was not accepting that I was a geek with geeky interests. These days I realize things arent as black and white, and that cool nerds exist. But I really gravitated toward the DnD and computer crowd but never really hung out with them. Instead I tried to be cool and had a lot of so called friends who didnt have anything in common with me.

If they do a decent enough job, I won't have to know that they're posing.

^thats correct as long as they know their stuff that theyre pretending to like

Thats what you generally have to do most of the time to fit in and make friends. So yes.

Being yourself could work the same, assuming there isnt anything deeply flawed about it that would leave you ostracized.

Yes, I would support someone who wants to fake it to fit in...because that's just what most people do. You have to fake it till you make it, that's the rule to life in general. Now obviously I don't agree with flat out lies, but just be smart about how far you stretch your truths. There are certain groups of people that I felt I had no interest with, but I do my best to fit in and in the end I ended up making some really good and close friends just being associated with said group. One of the best ways for me to fit in is by asking questions related to the interest of said group like if they're into surfing I would ask them questions about it and they would tell me interesting tidbits about it. So the next time I'm in another social gathering and the subject of surfing comes up, I at least have some sort of idea what I'm talking about. If people call me out for not knowing what I'm talking about, I usually go with the "Shit, looks like I was given bad information." and we all just laugh about it. Now if you suffer from heavy social anxiety, I can understand why this concept would be foreign to you.