Current Events > The Peter-vs-Trump Fight Was Lame, Here's How It Should Have Gone.

(+) Yeah! (+)

Seriously, they handled it with kid gloves. (Oh no, a call from the secret service? Teh horrorz!)
It's supposed to be a Chicken Fight. It should be over the top and involve Trump faux-dying like the Chicken Fight (also Peter in this case) They didn't even beat each other "far beyond the point of death yet they keep fighting" like Peter and the Chicken do. And bring back the "fighting with absurd random objects" like the Chicken fights and Homer fight.

PLEASE NOTE: This topic is SOLELY addressed to CEmen who have seen most or all of the chicken fights, the Peter-Homer fight, AND are familiar with some of the Family Guy gags (e.g. the bag of nickels)

--No stupid Trudeau scene
--No shirtless Trump pool scene. Seriously, nobody wants to see that shit.
--Keep the Trump-hair lashing attack.
--Bring back over-the-top absurd beatdowns with random objects like they have in the other Chicken fights/Homer fight

Also add these:
--The Secret Service agents try to shoot Trump, but conveniently miss each time *sometimes because Peter blocks it with a ridiculous object.* Over the course of the fight, most of them get knocked out. The remainder shrug their shoulders and decide to grab chairs and popcorn and simply watch the fight via spy satellites and an array of spy cameras throughout the country, even in ridiculous places *like, the sewer, the mens' bathroom, the middle of the woods, or the inside of a volcano or something. Oh, and the volcano would either be in Hawaii, or it would be "Mt Quahog" which we've never heard of and never hear about ever again. *One spy cam in the woods would be hanging from a tree branch, but the remainder are on the inside trees, with only the lens sticking out of the trunk. The sole remaining exception is the squirrel with a mini camera lens for an eye.*
--At one point, Trump grabs a bag full of nickels and swings it into Peter's crotch. Peter: "Augh, nickels!" *grabs crotch and collapses*
--They both grab KO'd SS agents' guns at one point.and shoot at one another and objects.
**at one point, someone *or something living* really annoying appears, and they both shoot it in unison.
--At one point, Trump goes "nooooo!" in slow-motion, and takes a bullet for a rack of American flags and cheeseburgers.
--He counters with a bullet, and Peter goes "nooooo!" in slow-motion, and takes a bullet for a rack of Starwars paraphernalia and Surfing Bird records.
--During the Trump hair-lashing scene, Peter eventually manages to grab the hair and yanks it off of Trump's head, revealing his baldness. Peter points and laughs until the hair emits a screeching sound and bites him, then scurries over to an angered Trump's shoulder. A purple discoloration spreads from the bite spot, *stopping half-way up his forearm* indicating that Trump's hair is a venomous creature. Peter sways with vertigo for a second, then goes back to fighting.

--It ends with Trump dying while Peter staggers away into the sunset with the buttock area of his pants ripped, as usual. Except that this time, he suddenly stops and collapses shortly afterwards. At this point, the purple discoloration has spread up the entirety of his arm and is visible on his neck.
Then it goes back to the dead Trump. A secret service agent checks him for a pulse, then turns to a second agent and shakes his head. That agent turns to a third agent and shakes his head. The third agent nods, then he plunges a syringe into the back of Trump's neck. We get a close-up of Trump's head, upper back, forearm, and hand. Trump suddenly opens a bloodshot eye, turns a much deeper orange, and gains height plus a fuckton of muscle mass, but his hands remain the same size to the tune of "DUN duun dun dun dun dun!" (The first "dun" coincides with the SS agent plunging the syringe into Trump's neck.) Also, as his bulk increases, his clothes tear in some places, mostly at the seams.
In the meantime, Peter *who is now completely purple from the hair venom* is in the ER, flatlined until the doctors manage to defibrillate him.

Does any of this sound better/funny to anyone else, or do you prefer the official version? (Please note that you need to actually picture these scenes in your head in order for them to be funny.)

Add a short bit where they come across the chicken, who agrees to a truce with Peter to fight Trump together (but then gets knocked out very quickly, maybe by an external factor like being hit by a bus).