Board 8 > Anagram Ranks Anything Legend of Zelda-related with Full Write-Ups (spoilers)

(+) Yeah! (+)

Cadence of Hyrule

Ocarina of Time

Great Bay Temple

Saria

Guess I should've been more specific, I meant the specific incarnation of Zelda that appears in Spirit Tracks, not the game as a whole

Heroic Fantasy

Groose (if only because of Ghirahim's writeup)

I Coveted That Wind
Link (Soul Calibur II)
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time: I think it's uncontroversial to call this the definitive Zelda title. When I think of Zelda as a series, this is what I think of. Not LA, not LttP, not BotW, just this. Is it a function of my age? Maybe. But this was one of those big tentpole games that changed everything, like Resident Evil 4 or Final Fantasy VII. Every action-adventure game after this steals some of its DNA, and I don't really blame them. OoT just does absolutely everything correct, aside from minor things like Zora's Domain never unfreezing or whatever. It even tells a story that's perfectly serviceable if you're a dumbass 10-year-old. What other fantasy media did we even have back then, ****ing Pagemaster? Get out of here. And this is the game that introduced Ganondorf, as opposed to Ganon. This is almost a masterclass in presentation. Every time you fight a boss, the screen is like "Parasitic Armored Arachnid: Gohma" or "Giant Aquatic Amoeba: Morpha," and then you get to the final boss, and it just says GANON. No flair, no nothing, it's just Ganon, and he's a big demon monster, and he's going to fight you now. Such a good presentation. Even the fight itself just feels more epic than most of the other games. This is just a game that was firing on all cylinders 100% of the time, at an important seminal moment for the series (the jump from 2D to 3D), and it brought the series into the future, exactly the same as Mario 64.
Zelda/Sheik in Smash
Midna

Good!
Cadence of Hyrule: What a great idea. I didn't realize Crypt of the Necrodancer was this popular in Japan, that it could persuade Nintendo to allow a crossover. It's way, WAY easier than Crypt, of course, but it's still really fun. Like, there's almost nothing I can say other than that this is a fun, quick little game that should be played if you care about Zelda, Crypt of the Necrodancer, or even Zelda music specifically. What other Nintendo series have enough famous tracks to be remixed in this way? Mario, Pokemon, and what else? And I mean, there's the Mario x Rabbids game, Fire Emblem x SMT, and that one crossover with Pokemon I don't remember but it's on the 3DS or something I'm too lazy to look it up. What other properties can Nintendo make bizarre crossovers with? Metroid almost got a Fortnite crossover, but it got cancelled at the last second. Has there been a Kirby crossover yet?
Princess Zelda (Spirit Tracks): I think this is the first good Zelda, right? I guess it's Tetra, but she's almost her own thing. Every Zelda before this was either a barely-existent noncharacter, or very reserved and dour. This is the first Zelda who's like energetic and helpful and a character in her own right. Although, unlike other Zeldas, she's explicitly a descendant of Tetra, right? So, is Link her cousin, and she falls in love with him anyway, or did Tetra bang someone other than WW Link? The world may never know. This is also technically Zelda's first playable appearance besides Smash and the CD-I games, right? Were there any other playable characters besides Kafei before this? I know a lot of people support Zelda having a bigger role in the series that's named for her, but I don't actually care, I'm fine with her being a minor character. But I'm also fine with her being a major character! And this version of Zelda is like the first time I ever sort of cared about her, she gets a lot of points for that, even if later Zeldas exceeded her.
Koji Kondo
The Missing Link
Goron: I remember as a dumb kid, I was into the lore of fictional universes. I spent so much time reading stupid WoW lore, I know more than probably anyone on B8 up to WotK (I stopped early into Cata and never went back). The Goron are such a cool idea. They perfectly fit the 'Japanese interpretation of European fantasy, with some stupid silly stuff added' vibe of the games. They're just big ugly rock guys, who eat rocks! That's all they are! They like rolling around, I guess. It's interesting how many tribes and races have been in Zelda games, but Goron are the most enduring. Yeah, Zora, Rito, and Koroks all show up, but Zora are in seven games, and Goron are in thirteen. Thirteen! They're one of the biggest Zelda mainstays, and they never do anything important. They're not there to flesh out the deep lore of Hyrule, they're just there to be another random village Link visits. "Where can we put an elemental fire temple? Oh, a volcano. What kind of people would live in a volcano?" And instead of just making them like dudes in cloaks, they went the extra mile and made them blocky goofy N64 rockmen, because why not? Why not make them goofy rock guys? For what the series needs them to do, Goron are the perfect race. And in MM, where you get to play as various races? Goddamn, is the Goron Mask not the most fun thing in the game? The Zora Mask is fun in water, but water is rare outside of Great Bay, whereas rolling around for speed is always useful and fun. As a kid, I liked the lithe prettyboyness of the Zora Mask, but as a grown-up, I vastly prefer the big fat stupid goof of the Goron Mask.
Hookshot
CD-I Cutscenes
Skull Kid
Going Straight to Castle Hyrule in BotW
Z3R
Magnet Gloves
BotW Cooking Jingle

Hey, Listen!
Great Bay Temple: The only good water level in all of video gamedom, there, I said it. Every time you have a water level in a video game, you sigh and groan and tolerate it. No one likes them. GBT is benefiting a lot from the fun Zora Mask mechanics, and yet... I think I've gotten lost at least one time every time I've played it. Never horribly lost, like I've wasted 35 minutes or more in the OoT Water Temple, but it is more confusing than your average dungeon. Is this... the worst dungeon in MM? It's between this and the swamp one. The swamp one is more dour and less fun to look at, like this one has pipes and movement and colors, so I'll give it to GBT anyway.
Heroic Fantasy: As a genre, I don't know. I like the genre sometimes, but it's generally less appealing to me than sci-fi and most other speculative fiction genres. And then there are just so many disappointments in the genre. I want to say that well over half of fantasy titles are trash. But the ones I do like, I like a lot. Lord of the Rings is one of the childhood-defining movie series for me, you know? And even that gets tainted by the Hobbit movies, and that Amazon series is REALLY on the edge for me. So, I don't know. This isn't an easy one to rank.
The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
Groose: I didn't mean to put this write-up next to Ghirahim's, ha, that was a coincidence. I know that Groose has a big following and that people love him, and everyone likes a good arrogant bully character who learns his lesson and becomes a good guy... but honestly, and this is so stupid, the only thing I distinctly remember about Groose is the scene where he goes to the surface world and says "small birds." SS is a game with way too much plot? For a Zelda game? And Groose is part of that. I don't really play this series for its deep lore and cutscenes. I play this series to have a sequence of progressively more difficult puzzles I have to solve with various items placed in front of me, punctuated by boss fights or stabbing skeletons or whatever. If it's got a fun story, then great, but I would never play a Zelda title *for* the story. Groose has to be the biggest side character in the series after Link, Zelda, and Ganondorf, right? Like, I can't think of anyone who gets remotely as much dialogue as he does. And for what? He never shows up again, he's not reincarnated endlessly like the music box guy. Poor Groose, not getting to bully Link endlessly through the eons.
Ghirahim
Medli
Saria: Okay, I admit, Medli isn't the first little girl in the series, I take it back. It's Saria. Oh wait, is it what's-her-face from LA? Is she also a ten-year-old? ****ing Fire Emblem poisoned my mind. I don't mind fish people evolving into bird people, but how did immortal fairy elves turn into root people? Did the Great Deku Tree magically transform them? Eh. Anyway, Saria is perfectly fine as like your childhood friend who stays behind in the village and becomes important later, but what is there to her? The only Saria moment I really remember is when she gives Link the ocarina and he awkwardly runs away, what a brilliant moment.
Hyrule Warriors
Rolling in Ocarina of Time: I consider this to be the same thing as rolling in any game, or using backsliding techniques in SotN, or things of that nature. God, imagine how illogical this must seem to people who don't understand video games, the idea that it's technically faster (or seems faster if you're an 11-year-old) to use a dodge ability instead of just running. Like, in real life, that obviously never happens, so it must be so unintuitive. The closest non-video game example I can think of is that stupid roll under the closing door that Geordi LaForge does in that one episode of TNG. By the way, yes, I rolled almost nonstop across Hyrule Field, I'm sure we all did.
The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap
Using Ocarina of Time to speedrun Paper Mario
Ezlo
Dragon Roost Island (Music)
Drgn roost island
The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks
The Legend of Zelda (Rabbit Joint)

Does it Really Make Everybody... Happy?
David Jr.
Makar
Kass
xenosaga's Impulse Link/Epona Figure
Legend of Zelda (NES)
Nintendo Cereal System
Rod of Seasons

Well ExcuuuuUUUUuuuuuuUUUUuuUuuuUUUUse Me, Princess!
Forced Stealth Sections
Zelda II: The Adventure of Link
Equipment Rental: I'll level with you: I rented everything, and just reset whenever I died. It's not a TERRIBLE idea conceptually, but it's obviously annoying to deal with in-game. Absolutely no one wants to pause their dungeon delving once it starts; once it starts, absolutely everyone wants to finish the dungeon and leave only after beating the boss, and if you die, then you want to get back to where you were and continue. ****ing zero people want to leave the dungeon, go back to Link's house, spend 25 rupees renting a hammer or whatever, and then trek back. I don't feel guilty for cheesing it at all.

If All Else Fails, Use Fire
Freshly-Picked Tingle's Rosy Rupeeland

I was skipped, I've been Anagram'd.

That's not what being Anagram'd means.

... but I'll do Ancient Cistern next time.

The Link to the Past comic that ran in Nintendo Power

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjpHzLYHkwA

The graphical style of Link's Awakening/Oracle of Seasons/Oracle of Ages

The silence of Link

Majoras Mask

The Mask Salesman

oh no totk

Gohma

Frostare

Stone Tower Temple

Link in GameFAQs contests

Bongo Bongo

Jeremy
(see this video for reference)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGuGvTOR74I

Anagram posted...

I know more than probably anyone on B8 up to WotK

Part of me is tempted to take you up on this, and part of me thinks I'll just get embarrassed because I never cared about WC3.

Nominate: Linkle

I Coveted That Wind
Link (Soul Calibur II)
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
Zelda/Sheik in Smash
Midna
Link (GameFAQs): Link is both the ultimate face and heel for this site's contests. It's always exciting whenever anyone gets 33% on Link, that makes them the moral victor by default. It's almost unfair, you know? The average age of this site is older than most other video game-related websites, so the victor of the contests is always going to be whomever was most relevant in 1999 and still relevant today, which is always going to be Link. It will never not be Link, not unless the FFVII remakes propel Cloud back into global consciousness (unlikely). But even though Link is the ultimate villain for the contests, rooting for him against Draven was one of the greatest moments in contest history. When the site went down during that one match, that was one of the most intense moments in contest history. I don't have Ulti's ability to go into great detail about everything that makes Link fun in the contests, all I can tell you is that it's impossible to dethrone him as the champion (it's been like twenty years, and I think that even in 2003, Cloud just got lucky and rode a wave of antivotes) and that he always gives either the most exciting or the most boring performances of any character.

Good!
Cadence of Hyrule
Princess Zelda (Spirit Tracks)
Koji Kondo
The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask: Ah man, remember cheaply-made trashy asset flips? Is this the most successful "make it in under a year" asset flip of all time? It has to be, right? I can't think of anything else that comes close. They knew to make exactly enough new content to carry the game, then added a time loop mechanic (which would be stolen by approximately eight-hundred-quintillion indie titles in the 2020s), and a transformation mechanic, and dialed up the dourness of OoT to the limit. And it works! Everything about this game works SO well. I don't know if I've ever heard anyone ever complain about this game. And I'm not the first to say this, but I'll say it anyway: to me, this is the last true 90s game. It may have come out in 2000, but this is the finale of what 90s video gamedom had to offer. This or FFIX, but MM is way better than FFIX, so I want to say it's MM. And what a gutsy move, to just excise Ganondorf and Zelda from the game entirely (yes, I know that Zelda shows up in a flashback for five seconds, that doesn't count), and make an entire new dimension where everything is like grimy and uneasy and kind of disgusting. OoT feels like an epic adventure where a hero explores the world and fights an ancient evil, but MM feels like you took the wrong offramp and ended up on the bad side of town. No one in this game ever feels especially happy, like they know their world is just sort of wrong, and they just have to make due. No wonder every teenage boy got annoyed with the direction WW took.
The Missing Link
Goron
Hookshot
CD-I Cutscenes
Skull Kid
Going Straight to Castle Hyrule in BotW
Japanese Link to the Past commercial: Deru deru deru This is so aggressively Japanese that I want to join the Imperial Navy and invade the Philippines. I love how they don't even attempt to make Link or Zelda look European, it reminds me of that one FMA live-action movie. Like, they didn't even give Zelda a blonde wig! She would look more like a geisha but for the elf ears. The guy who's playing Link at least has a brown wig on, though if this is for LttP, shouldn't it be pink? Why the hell was that Link's hair pink, anyway. Man, this guy's wig is spot-on for Link's hairstyle, like the color is wrong, but they must have spent a while getting the bangs that good. I would make a joke here about how I'd like a Zelda game where Ganon resurrects, and they have to defeat him using the power of dance, but that game already exists! I know everyone wants to make jokes about how commercials used to be better, but honestly, aside from the Sears AC commercial, I don't think I ever cared about any of them growing up. Commercials were mostly boring back then, and they're still boring today, the only difference is that youtube has conjured back to life the handful of funny old commercials like this one.
Z3R
Bongo Bongo: Great boss. Nothing more to say. What other fantasy game series even would do something like this, a pair of giant disembodied hands playing the bongo you're standing on in order to fight you? It's so random and bizarre.
Magnet Gloves
BotW Cooking Jingle
Stone Tower Temple: As far as dungeon gimmicks go, "turn everything upside-down whenever you feel like it" is a great one. It's simple, it's intuitive, it lends itself to a million gameplay opportunities, and it's always fun to use aspects of the ceiling as a floor. This is by no means unique to MM, a million other games have done this, but it's done perfectly well here. Fun fact, I've never beaten the boss without using the Giant's Mask. I know you can, though. If I had a criticism, I suppose it would be that the aesthetic of this dungeon is just nothing. It's the most standard "big stone dungeon" place you could possibly explore. Like, if someone told me to design a the most generic video game dungeon possible, a stone tower is second only to a castle's underground dungeon area linking into some spooky caves.

Hey, Listen!
Linkle: I know a lot of people support the idea of female Link as an option. I actually kind of disagree? I think it's important that Link stay as personality-less and element-less as possible. He needs to just be the most generic person possible, and giving you the option to control anything about him beyond clothing would damage that. But I don't mind the idea of female Link conceptually. Like, if in one of the thousand alternate dimensions attached to Hyrule, if you encountered female Link, and she was like "Yo boy Link, help me save Prince Zeldo from Ganandarf," I'd be down for that. And I don't even mind the idea of her using twin minicrossbows, that's fun and unique and sets her apart from Link's normal sword and normal bow. But like... she can't also exist when regular boy Link exists, you know? It's one or the other. So, I read up on her story on the Wiki, since I only played the original HW with no DLC, and her story is that she THINKS she's the real reincarnation of the hero, goes on a journey to fight Ganon, and never even encounters him, just saves random peasants from his monsters, while Link does all of the actual work, and she's just not related to Link or the legendary heroes at all? That's actually kind of amazing. It says that she was originally supposed to be Link's sister, but Eiji Aonuma didn't want her to conflict with Aryll? Bro, Aryll was in one game in like 2002. You can have Link have another ****ing sister, Jesus Christ. It says that Eiji Aunuma is open to the idea of her appearing in a real game, get wrecked, Linkle, that's never happening. You're doomed to noncanon female protagonist spinoff hell with FeMC from Persona 3.
Great Bay Temple
Heroic Fantasy
The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening

Link, the Silent Protagonist: You know, I'm going to be a huge hypocrite here. Normally, I don't like silent protagonists, but I'm just going to grandfather clause Link into being allowed. I'm fine with it for Link because, and I can't say this enough times, Link isn't a real character. Link is less of a character than like Mario; they're both just avatars for the idea of a hero. They're as simplistic as possible on purpose. If you want an example of what Link would be like if he was a real character, then you'd want to look at like Luke Skywalker, he's a good example. But Link himself? Not a real character, he's just a body for you to control, and in that regard, it makes sense for him to never speak or really show much emotion beyond righteous fury or whatever. That's probably why WW Link stands out so much; he actually shows emotions and even says words ("Come on!").
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
Groose
Ghirahim
Medli
Saria
Jeremy: Look, I promise to play TotK at some point. I can see that the point of the game is to make silly vehicles. God, remember Half-Life's physics? Remember how those were groundbreaking? I remember in 2002, reading someone on Board 8 talking about how the NPCs in Morrowind could turn their heads to face you as you walked by, and how games could never get more realistic than this, this was the best we'd ever have. And now, a Zelda game of all things can semi-accurately simulate things like weight distribution.
Hyrule Warriors
The Mask Salesman: As the only returning OoT character in MM besides Link (Zelda's flashback doesn't count), the Mask Salesman is just so... creepy. Everything about him just screams that something is wrong, like he's the embodiment of the guy who offers you candy to get into his van. And the handful of times he loses it and makes a scary face, it's great. You never learn what his ****ing deal is, just that he obviously is into some scary magical stuff and takes care of dangerous masks, and his very presence in the game raises questions about his actions as an unimportant sidequest giver in OoT. They did the right thing by never explaining anything about him.
Rolling in Ocarina of Time
The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap
Using Ocarina of Time to speedrun Paper Mario
Ezlo
Dragon Roost Island (Music)
Drgn roost island
The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks
Gameboy Zelda Aesthetic: When I think of the Zelda series, I think of three distinct styles. 1. Semi-realistic and dark (OoT, MM, TP). 2. Colorful cel-shaded and happy (WW and so on). 3. The 2D overhead spritework. I obviously know that there are games that don't fit into this, like AoL, and games that tried to update one of the previous and sort of failed (LBW), and games that ride the line between two of them (BotW), but mostly this is how I conceive of the series' aesthetic, as opposed to Mario, which has a very strong, definite visual style that it basically never deviates from except for very specific spin-offs like Paper Mario. The Gameboy aesthetic is obviously a variation of the 2D overhead version, with the Gameboy/Color limitations in mind, and it's... pretty good. It's different from LttP and its ilk not just because of the graphical limitations, but also because the games are actively sillier on purpose (compare OoX Impa to any other version, or OoX mounts to Epona, etc).
The Legend of Zelda (Rabbit Joint)

Does it Really Make Everybody... Happy?
Nintendo Power LttP Comics: I skimmed through these for this topic, and they're... fine. They're exactly what I expect from a 1992 tie-in comic. I can't possibly imagine anything less 'exactly what you expect' than this, even down to the particulars of the art style. All I'll really say is this: OoT turning the main villain from a demon pig into a sexy green-skinned Arab man was a good decision. Ganon was always just a discount Bowser, there, I said it. And we already have discount Bowser, his name is King K. Rool! And even within Mario itself, there's already ANOTHER discount Bowser in the form of Wart. So when I read this comic, and Ganon is just a big pig monster who has no particular goals beyond being evil, yeah, you know what, Ganondorf > Ganon. The classics aren't always right. Ganon is a good idea as Ganondorf's like monster form he turns into when he gets too corrupted by evil magic or whatever, but I vastly prefer human Ganondorf... is he human? Are Hylians human? Are Gerudo?
David Jr.
Makar
Kass
Gohma: To me, Gohma is the definitive first boss of video games. When I think of the first boss you have to fight, who's like harder than standard enemies and is there to force you to understand the game mechanics and not just power your way through, I think of Gohma... even though Gohma is only the first boss in one game. And again, this is such a good example of the Zelda aesthetic. How many fantasy games have giant spiders? They're like the most common enemy after skeletons. But Gohma is like this disgusting one-eyed spider-scorpion, like God, it's fantastic. Such a masterfully-designed enemy, at least from a visual perspective... from OoT-on, that is. You look at the earlier versions of Gohma from the older titles and it's like yeesh, I could draw a better spider monster.
xenosaga's Impulse Link/Epona Figure
Legend of Zelda (NES)
Nintendo Cereal System
Ancient Cistern: Alright, look, the aesthetic of this dungeon is okay. Lots of colorful clockwork areas juxtaposed with dark spooky caves. That's fine. But like... how many times have we seen this by now? This is the eight-hundredth Zelda title, you need something REALLY special to stand out in your dungeons. I won't tell you my favorite dungeon or boss (they're from different games, anyway), but neither is from SS. I guess... I guess what I can say about the Ancient Cistern is that it's like the Platonic ideal of a video game dungeon, you know? Ancient technology, big pirate chests to open, spooky caves, the only thing it's missing is skeletons laying on the ground that wake up when you get too close to a door. Those are in OoT, though. By the way, don't ask me to remember the gameplay details of a dungeon I played through forever ago. That game was for the ****ing Wii, give me a break. I do like the boss of this dungeon, though, this big robot guy with a bunch of arms. Although, honestly, if SS is meant to be the FIRST Zelda title, it could have done with not having ancient forgotten super technology, I'm just saying.
Rod of Seasons
Frostare: I had to look this one up. I mean, I played FSA, so I must have fought this thing, but it obviously left zero impression on me. Why are eyeballs such common monsters in fantasy games? Eyeballs are like the least intimidating part of a person or animal. They're like the most common weakpoint in real life! There is zero reason for eyeballs to be this common as enemies. And like... I'm sorry, but Zelda enemies aren't usually named for puns. This is the name you would give to an icy eyeball in Pokemon, the Zelda version should be like ANCLOPS: MYSTICAL OPTICAL OCTOPUS, and be an eyeball with eight tentacles or something.

Well ExcuuuuUUUUuuuuuuUUUUuuUuuuUUUUse Me, Princess!
Forced Stealth Sections
Zelda II: The Adventure of Link
Equipment Rental

You've Met with a Terrible Fate
Freshly-Picked Tingle's Rosy Rupeeland

Oracle of Seasons/Oracle of Ages

The Zelda timeline

Malo Mart

Heart Pieces locked behind bullshit minigames

The Gerudo Outfit

Vaati

Well ExcuuuuUUUUuuuuuuUUUUuuUuuuUUUUse Me, Princess!

Hbthebattle posted...

Heart Pieces locked behind bullshit minigames

Heart Piece locked behind 100% figurine completion. :^)

Stamina

Anagram posted...

Why the hell was that Link's hair pink, anyway.

Link has pink hair because the developers used a graphical compression technique that limited the color palette in order to get more sprites in the table.

The name "The Legend of Zelda"

Ganon's Tower (LttP)

Hearts

The Legend of Zelda Second Quest

that one heart piece in majoras mask that requires you to dump 5,000 rupees in the bank

I Coveted That Wind
Link (Soul Calibur II)
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
Zelda/Sheik in Smash
Midna
Link (GameFAQs)

Good!
Cadence of Hyrule
Princess Zelda (Spirit Tracks)
Koji Kondo
The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Gerudo Outfit (BotW): I'm assuming you mean the sequence where Link dresses up as a Gerudo to infiltrate their city in BotW. I'm going to be a huge hypocrite here and contradict myself, I know I made a huge deal earlier of wanting Link to have no strong personality traits and to never really display emotions, but having him have to do this and act all embarrassed like Cloud in FFVII is a great idea. It's one of the most fun and memorable parts of the game, too. I wonder... was this like a very belated response to MM? Because if you play OoT and MM close to each other, like probably all of us did as kids, you'll definitely notice how OoT introduces Dekus, Gorons, Zora, and Gerudo, and MM lets you play as a Deku, a Goron, a Zora, and... that's it. As a kid, I wondered if this was a conscious choice, like they didn't want Link to turn into a girl, or if it was just laziness on the developers' part, because the transformation mask you get in the fourth area is the Giant's Mask, which you use exactly once in the entire game. I still don't REALLY know what motivated them not to include the obvious Gerudo Mask, so I wonder if that influenced the Gerudo sequence in BotW. But then, like, Triforce Heroes already established Link as just wearing princess outfits and being fine with it! Ah well, I really like how the Gerudo buy it, like Link is not only obviously a boy, but he's also half their height, doesn't have red hair, and is way paler than them. I unironically enjoy garbage disguises that NPCs just accept.
The Missing Link
Goron
Hookshot
Hearts: It's so stupid. Like, obviously the hearts are just HP. Each heart is 4 HP, and you can have, say, 20 hearts maximum in most games, so you have a maximum of 80 HP. But making it into cartoony hearts instead of just a clear number, I don't know, it definitely lends SOMETHING to the games. It's hard to express in words, because it's obviously more of a feeling, but the hearts really help disguise the fact that this is all just a video game, like the hearts more represent your life rather than life meter, if that makes sense? And imagine what the life pickup would be if not a heart. Would it be a fairy? Would it just be a piece of food? Is there an alternate dimension out there where Link's health pickup is a riceball? I can easily imagine that.
CD-I Cutscenes
Legend of Zelda (Name): Many people have made jokes about how the name of the series makes no sense, since the games are undeniably about Link. Zelda can charitably be called the third most important person in the series, and even that's not certain. But it's a great name. That Z really lends the title a little pizzazz that "The Legend of Link" doesn't. I know that Zelda is a real name, and Link isn't, and the more fantastical names usually lend themselves better to being in fantasy titles, and yet... "The Legend of Zelda" still sounds better, sorry. Great name. Instantly tells me that this is going to be some kind of fantasy title, if nothing else.
Skull Kid
Going Straight to Castle Hyrule in BotW
Japanese Link to the Past commercial
Z3R
Bongo Bongo
Magnet Gloves
BotW Cooking Jingle
Stone Tower Temple

Hey, Listen!
Linkle
Second Quest: Great idea to extend the game and give players another challenge. I feel like this would be a much better-remembered aspect of the series, though, if it existed in more than three games. This honestly ought to be a standard part of the series! Like, every game (except maybe Triforce Heroes) should have this as an option. It cannot possibly be THAT difficult and time-consuming to add.
Great Bay Temple
Heroic Fantasy
The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening
Link, the Silent Protagonist
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons/Ages: I'll just say right off the bat, making these companion games was a great idea. It's better than the way Pokemon does it, where I have never once felt a compulsion to play the opposite version of a Pokemon game. Here, it's legitimately one gigantic game split into two pieces, so you, a dumbass kid in 2001, want to play them both. Is this also the last major game of all time to prominently use a password system? I remember reading about this game online a few years after its release, where Nintendo desperately wanted to find a way not to use the complicated password system, but couldn't find any other way to transfer data on just one Gameboy. Basically, the way I view these games is simple: they're just more LA. The mechanics are exactly the same, but each game has one reverse world (I've said this before, but Zelda has more reverse worlds than I think any other game series in history). That's it! I also like how the games have their own unique villains, even if things ultimately just degenerate into more Ganon shenanigans. Here, I really like how Ganon is revived from death incorrectly, and is just a rampaging monster you have to stop. Imagine this from Link's perspective, though. You're just a random incarnation of Link, you have no real understanding of the convoluted timeline or legacy you're part of, and you just want to stop an evil sexy sorceress from taking over the world, and then two crones fly in and resurrect a pig demon who goes crazy because his brain doesn't work correctly. Imagine that happening without the audience's greater context. Poor Link.

Groose
Ghirahim
Medli
Saria
Well ExcuuuuUUUUuuuuuuUUUUuuUuuuUUUUse Me, Princess!: I said it before, but imagine if this was the direction Nintendo went with for Link. This sarcastic, childish jackass. Like, whose idea even was this? It's so obvously an annoying take on the character, I love it. Was this an attempt at something subversive after the success of the played-much-straighter He-Man? I have no idea.
Jeremy
Hyrule Warriors
Ganon's Tower (LttP): I mean... it's a fairly standard final dungeon, isn't it? It doesn't seem special to me at all. Final dungeons in video games have a very specific kind of feeling to them, and this is it.
The Mask Salesman
Rolling in Ocarina of Time
Stamina: Gets the job done in BotW, I guess. I don't have anything insightful to say about stamina specifically, but since we're talking about BotW, I'll say this. BotW's biggest problem to me isn't the dungeons, which people complain about, it's the lack of what feels like progression. In each Zelda game except BotW, when you get a new item or obtain a macguffin, it feels significant. It feels like you've accomplished something, and your adventure has taken a new turn. BotW's progression is so slow that it never feels like you've had an important moment, just a series of moments where you get incrementally stronger. Upgrading your hearts and stamina are an example of this -- it's always good, but I never once felt like "yeah, I'm closer to fighting Ganon now." The only exception is when you get the Master Sword, that's the only time in the game that feels like a significant moment.
The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap
Using Ocarina of Time to speedrun Paper Mario
Ezlo
Dragon Roost Island (Music)
Malo Mart: The... main shop in Twilight Princess? Where you buy the shield? I mean... I don't know if I've ever thought about this store at all after finishing the game. I'm not even sure I thought about it while playing the game. How many shops has Link visited in this series, and you nominated THIS one?
Drgn roost island
The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks
Gameboy Zelda Aesthetic
The Legend of Zelda (Rabbit Joint)

Well ExcuuuuUUUUuuuuuuUUUUuuUuuuUUUUse Me, Princess!
Vaati: Until I looked it up just now, I actually didn't realize that Vaati's first two appearances were in the Four Swords games as just a big monster, and his humanoid form came later. Really following in Ganon's footsteps there, eh? Except where Ganon goes from being a sexy muscular Arab man who shoots dark magic to a giant disgusting pig demon, Vaati goes from being a sexy lithe anime boy who shoots wind magic to an abstract eyeball monster. I mean... does anyone like it when the villain is Ganon, instead of Ganondorf? It's always more interesting to have a human villain than a big monster man. Anyway, Vaati. Look, I like Vaati, but he has no place in the series. He's a sorcerer who gets corrupted by evil and turns into a big monster you need to stab a lot. Do you know who's also a sorcerer who gets corrupted by evil and turns into a big monster you need to stab a lot? Ganondorf. Vaati is just the Daisy to Ganondorf's Peach. If there was like Zelda Kart, and they needed to pad a roster, then maybe you could do something with Vaati. But since the lore of this series is so abstract, and no one really cares that much when a game is set, you can always just have Ganondorf show up, so what purpose does Vaati serve? I'll tell you what he can do. He could be in Smash. Zelda as a series has six Smash characters, three of which are Link, two of which are Zelda, and one of which is a Captain Falcon clone. I don't mind Zelda having fewer characters than Mario and Pokemon, that's fine, I agree with that. But ****ing Fire Emblem has EIGHT characters. I know that Vaati will never be in Smash, of course. His only humanoid appearance is in a GBA title from 2004 that no one particularly cares about. Was it a GBA game, or a DS one? I don't even remember. I'm sorry if you're ride-or-die for this character, it's never going to happen. Vaati is just the most significant of the early 2000s bad guys from when Nintendo was willing to experiment a little more with villains who weren't Ganondorf, alongside Skull Kid, Sexy Sorceress Lady, and Big Armor Guy Whose Name No One Remembers. Eventually, Nintendo realized that every villain who isn't Ganondorf is pointless, and they just stopped showing up. Do you know the last game to not have Ganon, Ganondorf, alternate dimension Ganondorf, or a clone of Ganon as the main villain? 2015 Triforce Heroes' Lady Maud, a character I have literally no memory of, and had to look up. Before her, it was 2007 Phantom Hourglass' Bellum. Although, the Zelda Wiki says Yuga is the counterpart of Agahnim and not Ganondorf? I don't know if I buy that, he looks way more like Ganondorf. I want opinions, weigh in here and tell me if Yuga looks more like Ganondorf or Agahnim. Anyway, to be clear, I have nothing against Vaati, but he's just a pointless interlude between Ganon appearances. He feels almost like someone's OC.
Nintendo Power LttP Comics
David Jr.
Makar
Kass
5000 Rupee Heart Piece in MM: I mean, it's annoying, but if you're diligent about things, you'll just get this as you play. I agree it should have been way less, though. Like 2000 would be fine.
Gohma
xenosaga's Impulse Link/Epona Figure
Legend of Zelda (NES)
Frostare
Nintendo Cereal System
Ancient Cistern
Rod of Seasons
Forced Stealth Sections
Heart Pieces Locked Behind Bad Minigames: It's always annoying. I've never gotten max hearts in any game in the series. There will always be at least one heart that's just too much of a pain in the ass to bother with. The most annoying minigame I'm willing to deal with is probably bombchu bowling. Maybe a little more than that, but not by much.
Zelda II: The Adventure of Link

You've Met with a Terrible Fate
Equipment Rental
Zelda Timeline: I hate the Zelda timeline for two reasons. The first is that it's pointless and stupid. Zelda lore is second only to Mario lore in the list of things you shouldn't care about at all. Like, all the Zelda timeline needs to be is a very vague draft of random stupid adventures Link, Zelda, and Ganondorf have over the eons. That's it. Trying to backtrack and tack deep lore onto an existing series decades after it started, when the start of the series was just "you're an elf, go stop a pig demon from taking over the world," is just annoying. Every time they try to expand the Zelda lore, I'm just annoyed. It's like when Pokemon made an entire game about Arceus to expand the deep pokelore, and it's nothing but cutscenes, and it's like oh my god I don't care, this isn't what I play Pokemon for at all. The second reason I hate the timeline is that it's just terrible. It's funny to talk with your friends and speculate about where each game should go on a timeline, whether Link is reincarnating or the same guy each time (put to bed by WW, admittedly), and so on. But when Nintendo publishes its own official timeline, and it's got like three branching paths, and then BotW enters the picture, it's like, you made this as convoluted as possible to no one's benefit, and removed the ability to speculate for fun.
Freshly-Picked Tingle's Rosy Rupeeland

Anagram posted...

Malo Mart: The... main shop in Twilight Princess? Where you buy the shield? I mean... I don't know if I've ever thought about this store at all after finishing the game. I'm not even sure I thought about it while playing the game. How many shops has Link visited in this series, and you nominated THIS one?

Guess you never helped them expand because their Castle Town branch really makes them memorable.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yaYBy0Jc7BA

Anyway my next nomination is Colgera's boss theme

Four Swords

King Harkinian

Demise

redrocket posted...

Four Swords

Just realized I haven't played this, only FSA, so I can't rank it.

Re: Hearts

Interestingly, the game my studio is working one settled on just a HP bar with the numerical value besides it, although we had hearts until pretty late in development. I believe ultimately it's because the HP bar + numerical value are more immediately intuitive as the game is a pretty fast-paced ARPG roguelite, so we chose something that's more readable at a glance.

Anyway...
Prince Sidon

Anagram posted...

Just realized I haven't played this, only FSA, so I can't rank it.

Ok

The Wind Waker