Current Events > Leashing a toddler: yes or no?

(+) Yeah! (+)

PissedOffMonk posted...

If you want to talk about safety, skip the leash and just put all kids in a pet carrier. I'm sorry, I meant kid carrier.

You mean a stroller?

PissedOffMonk posted...

If you want to talk about safety, skip the leash and just put all kids in a pet carrier. I'm sorry, I meant kid carrier.

What do you think a stroller is? They have built in straps.

Edit: Touche Raikuro, beat me to it.

Strollers are still deemed unsafe because it doesn't include a protective cage door.

PissedOffMonk posted...

If you want to talk about safety, skip the leash and just put all kids in a pet carrier. I'm sorry, I meant kid carrier.

We do that. They're called strollers.

Also these things:
https://a.storyblok.com/f/187315/1667x2501/2dc0a6e7ca/088047-baby-carrier-harmony-dark-green-3d-mesh-lookbook-babybjorn-06.jpg

Dear lord this is going off the rails.

Whats next?! When theyre in the car are we going to strap children in a special seat? When we take them to a restaurant are we going to put them in some sort of.. high chair?!

Alteres posted...

Dear lord this is going off the rails.

I think it came down to certain people overreacted to the word "leash," and now they don't want to back down, no matter how illogical or unhinged their argument needs to get.

TMOG posted...

Please explain how wearing a harness will prevent a child from learning social cues or not to wander off

Because when your kid is bound, theres no reason for the parent to engage their child. They can ignore them if they wanted. Of course not all parents would do that. The ones who use leashes tend to though. Unless theres a medical reason for it, and there are countless medical reasons why you would, as I originally said.

MICHALECOLE posted...

Whats next?! When theyre in the car are we going to strap children in a special seat? When we take them to a restaurant are we going to put them in some sort of.. high chair?!

I hear some sick bastards are even putting railings on their kids' beds so they can't fall out of them at night!

bfslick50 posted...

Much more than one according to you. It has potential to be a never-ending snowball. Grandma will be fine with one lousy holiday away from family but you'll also be fucking fine if your sensitive ears have to hear a child that's not performing to your standards. I'd prioritize family time over making random stranger not slightly annoyed.

Additionally, the kids that travel best are the kids that have traveled before.

This is such a big problem with the world. People are too okay with inconveniencing others. Loud children are just a microcosm of the larger issue. Maybe there is something for children to learn so future generations of adults won't make the same mistakes that current ones do.

I don't think most toddlers need them but there are always exceptions where solutions like it may be necessary.

hockeybub89 posted...

This is such a big problem with the world. People are too okay with inconveniencing others. Loud children are just a microcosm of the larger issue. Maybe there is something for children to learn so future generations of adults won't make the same mistakes that current ones do.

People making a big deal and refusing to be sympathetic over minor conveniences isn't any better. Sometimes even good kids act up. You can't expect parents and families to stay in all day.

Which of course people also complain about.

boomgetchopped3 posted...

Because when your kid is bound, theres no reason for the parent to engage their child. They can ignore them if they wanted. Of course not all parents would do that. The ones who use leashes tend to though. Unless theres a medical reason for it, and there are countless medical reasons why you would, as I originally said.

Ok as I've said multiple times in this topic but it bears repeating for my point, I work at a place where a lot of parents bring their kids

What I observe is that the parents who have their kids on leashes are far less likely to be the ones too distracted by their phone or the other parents with them to notice that their kid has run off past a crowd of people to touch a rock or waddled through a door without their parent

And if the leashed-up parents do get distracted by something, guess whose kid isn't going to get very far

I swear it's like some of you have never seen a toddler before. I can leave my dog home alone while I go to work. My house would need so many additional precautions if I had a dumb toddler instead of a dog. Dogs can do so much more than toddlers. Toddlers are idiots. My dog would never jump off of something that was too high to land safely. Leave my dog and a toddler alone somewhere random and 24 hours later my dog will be fine.

hockeybub89 posted...

This is such a big problem with the world. People are too okay with inconveniencing others. Loud children are just a microcosm of the larger issue. Maybe there is something for children to learn so future generations of adults won't make the same mistakes that current ones do.

There are lots of things that aren't okay here.
If a child is harnessed, the child is LESS likely to inconvenience you, but for some reason you're opposed to it still-- which makes it seem more like you're upset of the existence of children around either. What should be learned is that children exist, and other people exist in circumstances that you may or may not understand and you shouldn't literally think when you see an adult with a child "goddamn, these people are okay with inconveniencing people like me." THAT is even worse than "someone brought a child somewhere, they're so fine with inconveniencing others."

I'm not bothered by children being children in public. Even if they cut up a bit. But apparently you are-- which says more about you than kids.

TMOG posted...

Ok as I've said multiple times in this topic but it bears repeating for my point, I work at a place where a lot of parents bring their kids

What I observe is that the parents who have their kids on leashes are far less likely to be the ones too distracted by their phone or the other parents with them to notice that their kid has run off past a crowd of people to touch a rock or waddled through a door without their parent

And if the leashed-up parents do get distracted by something, guess whose kid isn't going to get very far

While I don't work with children anymore, this is also something that I noticed as well. Harnessed kids are generally involved with everything the parent is doing because the child is not only in close proximity, but because if the parent gave their child a harness, there's probably a reason.

ArtiRock posted...

Saying harnesses like that are bad is like saying things like carrying wraps or backpacks are bad as well. This is sounding more like a "I don't want children to be seen or heard as toddlers."

Wraps and backpacks sound much safer than leashes. I'd be worried about a toddler on a leash like I would a small dog on a leash in a very public place.

hockeybub89 posted...

Wraps and backpacks sound much safer than leashes. I'd be worried about a toddler on a leash like I would a small dog on a leash in a very public place.

But they are completely different tools for different things. You generally don't put toddlers in backpacks or wraps as they are big enough to walk. Why would you be worried about a toddler on a leash like a dog? Do you think the child will bite you?

Yes. Better than then letting them wander off and get lost or worse.

hockeybub89 posted...

Wraps and backpacks sound much safer than leashes. I'd be worried about a toddler on a leash like I would a small dog on a leash in a very public place.

And a harness is safer than nothing, and less restrictive than those options. It's almost like it depends on the situation/child, yeah?

hockeybub89 posted...

Wraps and backpacks sound much safer than leashes. I'd be worried about a toddler on a leash like I would a small dog on a leash in a very public place.

Harnesses are literally wraps and backpacks that the child wears

"Leash" tends to be used by people who oppose harnesses just because "we never wore one when I was a kid/my kids were younger" and hate anything different from what they view as "the norm", so they chose that word to conjure up the image of a kid literally wearing a leash and collar around their neck like a dog

The thing I've learned as a parent is that no matter what you do people have an opinion that it's wrong.

It's basically a necessity to stop giving a shit about what random people think and doing what is best for your own kids when you become a parent. Nothing else has made me learn that lesson more. Everyone has an opinion and they usually stink. They're often stated from a place of ignorance. Nobody else knows your own kids as much as you do.

If you've gotta leash your kid you gotta leash your kid. It's easy to give an opinion that it's wrong or you're bad. What isn't easy is raising a kid and figuring out the best solutions every single day.

hockeybub89 posted...

This is such a big problem with the world. People are too okay with inconveniencing others. Loud children are just a microcosm of the larger issue. Maybe there is something for children to learn so future generations of adults won't make the same mistakes that current ones do.

Nah, the problem is people have no patience for each other. You're pissed off that a loud kid inconvenienced you, but you give zero fucks about how much you inconvenience others. You literally said you don't care if families don't get to reunite every year for the holidays, that your comfort is more important than theirs. The parent that's bringing back-up food and toys and coloring books to try and keep the kid quiet is so much more inconvenienced by preparing and carrying all that than you are by hearing noise. And that parent should be more inconvenienced as their the one who brought the child, but a 100% success rate is not feasible. And children that are kept locked away their entire childhood are not going to grow up to be well-adjusted adults. What you want will make things worse.

bfslick50 posted...

And children that are kept locked away their entire childhood are not going to grow up to be well-adjusted adults.

Maybe that explains hockeybub's constant miserable outlook on everything.

Punished_Blinx posted...

The thing I've learned as a parent is that no matter what you do people have an opinion that it's wrong.

It's basically a necessity to stop giving a shit about what random people think and doing what is best for your own kids when you become a parent. Nothing else has made me learn that lesson more. Everyone has an opinion and they usually stink. They're often stated from a place of ignorance. Nobody else knows your own kids as much as you do.

If you've gotta leash your kid you gotta leash your kid. It's easy to give an opinion that it's wrong or you're bad. What isn't easy is raising a kid and figuring out the best solutions every single day.

this is a very adult pov. Its easy to fall into the trap of giving others advice based on what youve learned as a parent. Because those lessons are always hard learned and they are so valuable to you, you think its important to others and must be passed on. The reality is more complicated because every kid is different.

bfslick50 posted...

And children that are kept locked away their entire childhood are not going to grow up to be well-adjusted adults. What you want will make things worse.

TIL a part of the toddler stage = their entire childhood

bfslick50 posted...

Nah, the problem is people have no patience for each other. You're pissed off that a loud kid inconvenienced you, but you give zero fucks about how much you inconvenience others. You literally said you don't care if families don't get to reunite every year for the holidays, that your comfort is more important than theirs. The parent that's bringing back-up food and toys and coloring books to try and keep the kid quiet is so much more inconvenienced by preparing and carrying all that than you are by hearing noise. And that parent should be more inconvenienced as their the one who brought the child, but a 100% success rate is not feasible. And children that are kept locked away their entire childhood are not going to grow up to be well-adjusted adults. What you want will make things worse.

Damn man well said.

Seriously the world could just go with a lot more empathy. The whole anti-kids/parents attitude that's often in the internet really sucks. Most people are trying their best.

hockeybub89 posted...

TIL a part of the toddler stage = their entire childhood

The toddler years are crucial for their development. All of it. That's where they are literally learning how to be a person.

At no stage should they be kept indoors because manchildren don't want to hear a kid get upset for a few minutes.

Tenlaar posted...

Maybe that explains hockeybub's constant miserable outlook on everything.

Yeah man, maybe I'd be less upset bout fascists trying to eradicate queer people and destroy my livelihood if I was leashed when I was 18 months old. I was an overly passive small child anyway.

Punished_Blinx posted...

At no stage should they be kept indoors because manchildren don't want to hear a kid get upset for a few minutes.

Tbf I don't want to single out toddlers. Many people of a much more developed age are perfectly content with being a bother to others instead of doing all they can to realize that they are not the only ones in public.

hockeybub89 posted...

Tbf I don't want to single out toddlers. Many people of a much more developed age are perfectly content with being a bother to others instead of doing all they can to realize that they are not the only ones in public.

You know what often attracts those kinds of people? Kids.

boomgetchopped3 posted...

Because when your kid is bound, theres no reason for the parent to engage their child. They can ignore them if they wanted. Of course not all parents would do that. The ones who use leashes tend to though. Unless theres a medical reason for it, and there are countless medical reasons why you would, as I originally said.

I got bad news for you, parents don't need leashes to ignore their kids. They can just as easily strap them in a stroller and chain it to a bike rack while popping into the pub for a few pints. Bad parents are gonna bad parent. Strollers, harnesses, and car seats are safety devices

hockeybub89 posted...

Yeah man, maybe I'd be less upset bout fascists trying to eradicate queer people and destroy my livelihood if I was leashed when I was 18 months old. I was an overly passive small child anyway.

If your constant miserable outlook was limited to the attempted eradication of queer people you wouldn't be in this topic being a miserable curmudgeon about some people using a harness to keep their kids from running off or even just taking their kids out in public. You're upset about literally everything at all times. It must be exhausting.

My aunt used to put a harness on my cousin and tie it to a stake in the back yard while she watched her soaps. When she babysat me I was always allowed to run free and remember him sitting in the middle of the yard playing with Tonka trucks. Seemed normal at the time.

Tenlaar posted...

If your constant miserable outlook was limited to the attempted eradication of queer people you wouldn't be in this topic being a miserable curmudgeon about some people using a harness to keep their kids from running off or even just taking their kids out in public. You're upset about literally everything at all times. It must be exhausting.

Tenlaar posted...

If your constant miserable outlook was limited to the attempted eradication of queer people you wouldn't be in this topic being a miserable curmudgeon about some people using a harness to keep their kids from running off or even just taking their kids out in public. You're upset about literally everything at all times. It must be exhausting.

I dont know what else hes upset about but its completely justified to be upset over leashed kids

LeoRavus posted...

My aunt used to put a harness on my cousin and tie it to a stake in the back yard while she watched her soaps. When she babysat me I was always allowed to run free and remember him sitting in the middle of the yard playing with Tonka trucks. Seemed normal at the time.

now this is the correct way to use a leash

LeoRavus posted...

My aunt used to put a harness on my cousin and tie it to a stake in the back yard while she watched her soaps. When she babysat me I was always allowed to run free and remember him sitting in the middle of the yard playing with Tonka trucks. Seemed normal at the time.

Fuck. Thats definitely the extreme example but thats messed up. Some parents use harnesses for the wrong reasons

boomgetchopped3 posted...

Fuck. Thats definitely the extreme example but thats messed up. Some parents use harnesses for the wrong reasons

Oh.. yeah.. right.. thats wrong! What psycho would think that was the correct way? Not me thats for sure haha

MICHALECOLE posted...

Oh.. yeah.. right.. thats wrong! What psycho would think that was the correct way? Not me thats for sure haha

i knew you were joking lol.

Kloe_Rinz posted...

I dont know what else hes upset about but its completely justified to be upset over leashed kids

No its not. Your opinion is dumb.

Tenlaar posted...

No its not. Your opinion is dumb.

Absolutely not. Next.

I can actually remember having to wear one of these on my wrist when I was really little. I'm surprised I can remember back that far, because my memory is pretty shitty. But I wasn't in any kind of distress by it, and actually remember liking the "leash" as it was translucent and a color of red that I really liked.

Maybe my mom even let me pick the color out? Would probably make things easier as far as getting me to wear it.

LeoRavus posted...

My aunt used to put a harness on my cousin and tie it to a stake in the back yard while she watched her soaps. When she babysat me I was always allowed to run free and remember him sitting in the middle of the yard playing with Tonka trucks. Seemed normal at the time.

When I was younger I used to have a pet rabbit that my dad would leash and stake to the yard so it could run free while still being safe from predators. So if anything you should congratulate your aunt for making her kid slightly more inconvenient for hawks to eat.

If you're a parent doing what you feel is necessary for the safety of your child, whatever that may be, carry on and best of luck to you.

If you're not a parent but have opinions about things . . . well the internet is the place for you, I guess.

ai123 posted...

If you're a parent doing what you feel is necessary for the safety of your child, whatever that may be, carry on and best of luck to you.

If you're not a parent but have opinions about things . . . well the internet is the place for you, I guess.

Parents hand kids iPads to watch tik Tok all day because its what they feel is nescessary to reclaim as much personal time as possible and they dont want to parent their kid except on special occasions

Kloe_Rinz posted...

Parents hand kids iPads to watch tik Tok all day because its what they feel is nescessary to reclaim as much personal time as possible and they dont want to parent their kid except on special occasions

Are you with many kids all day to know that?

Punished_Blinx posted...

Are you with many kids all day to know that?

Have you ever been to a shopping centre/mall?

Kloe_Rinz posted...

Have you ever been to a shopping centre/mall?

Do kids spend all of their day in a shopping mall?

Does it bother you when kids are noisy and running around in a shopping mall?

There is one valid use case I saw recently for using a leash. We were at the zoo with my boy. And I saw a woman alone with her kid. She was pretty overweight, so much so that I think shed have a hard time running after her kid if he ran off. She used a leash. Now, clearly she was there at the zoo for her child, because thats the only reason an adult would go. So she cares about her kid. She wasnt neglecting him. But she had a medical reason for the leash too. If shes not able to run after him then its far more important to keep him safe obviously.

Punished_Blinx posted...

Do kids spend all of their day in a shopping mall?

Does it bother you when kids are noisy and running around in a shopping mall?

Are you saying good parents allow their kids to run and scream in a mall just because they felt it was necessary?

Kloe_Rinz posted...

Are you saying good parents allow their kids to run and scream in a mall just because they felt it was necessary?

Yeah. Malls have areas for kids to run around in.

A_Good_Boy posted...

Yeah. Malls have areas for kids to run around in.

Like the food aisles where people are trying to shop?