Current Events > Donald Trump leaves something in his will, what will you do with it?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Donald Trump dies from natural causes. At the reading of his will it turns out that his fortune of $20 must be split among his children. No one cares.

But the big news is that he leaves to YOU his actual most prized position....
His MAGA followers.

He instructs all of MAGA, that you are the new Golden Messiah, and they must follow you as they followed him.

You are now the God-King and unquestionable ruler of the MAGA Red cap cult.
What do you do?

I mean, I could use this power to do unprecedented good in the world. But, I could also use it to create a large number of simultaneous Rickroll flash mobs.

It now occurs to me that I could also do both.

Turn them into actual Patriots, not fascist fuck faces

Then him being the anti-christ is validated.

Convince them to abandon America entirely to live together on an island somewhere in the ocean (which presumably can't support all of them), and then strand them all there.

SpawnShadow posted...

Convince them to abandon America entirely to live together on an island somewhere in the ocean (which presumably can't support all of them), and then strand them all there.

Life uh... Finds a way and they all make a thriving far right community then invade nearby islands and take over the ocean

Invite them to Guyana for a soiree.

I can't see it working.

I could try to make them less racist, homophobic, transphobic etc, but all that would happen is they'd run off to follow the next person willing to voice their prejudices.

In much the same way that Donald looked at the vast array of astroturfed angry pressure groups, and realised he could take them away from the mainstream GOP who paid for them just by saying the quiet parts out loud.

wackyteen posted...

Life uh... Finds a way and they all make a thriving far right community then invade nearby islands and take over the ocean

With the MAGAts out of the American voter rolls, it shouldn't be too hard to convince an actual functional US government that they're a threat to vital trading partners and that they should, at the very least, be blockaded.

I guess I'm running for President in 2028.

My fellow Americans.

Take up plogging and clean up our nations roads and waterways.

Take public transit where it is feasible, and support local politicians who will expand public transit where it is not.

Eat a diet rich in whole grains and legumes.

Judge people not by the color of their skin but the content of their hearts.

Donate to your local food bank.

Volunteer with Habitat for Humanity.

I ask them all to change a lightbulb. Should keep them occupied for a few decades.