Board 8 > ITT I Rate Every Horror Movie I Watch in October

(+) Yeah! (+)

Censor is the best movie of the year and potentially even a top 10/15 all time movie for me. It has so many aspects of horror and psychological weirdness I absolutely love.

Freaky was pretty decent, had some funny moments for sure.

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71. Censor (Hulu)

This is a very abstract and enjoyable psychological horror.

Censor is about a British movie censor who thinks a movie is related to her sister's disappearance.

This is an 80's styled in an exploitation movie, and it is a great movie visually. The style is wild and serves to make the whole film such a trip.

The plot is, in general, about this censor slowly losing her grip on reality, and the question of whether or not she is. The psychedelic colors and 80's feel add to all of that. Throughout the film, you're wondering how much she's just hallucinating and how much is real.

And let me just say the way they perfectly roll all of these things together to make you uncertain until the very end of the movie is brilliant. Even with little details. I looooved the way this movie just kept you guessing until the end. And the actual ending? It's so awesome. It works perfectly and I'd gush about it, but I would rather other people watch it instead!

Very worth it for a trippy film that is pretty brilliant.

Rating: 8.5/10

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Movie #24, I Still Know What You Did Last Summer. Ehhhh, not enough scary stuff, way too much time with the annoying kids. Jeffrey Combs was good in this though

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Freaky was okay, but I wasn't a big fan

What holds it back the most is that so much of the supposed appeal of this movie's comedy is that it's very large man Vince Vaughn playing a teenage girl. But ultimately, his antics are never funny or even really enjoyable to watch imo, because it's really Vince Vaughn's (or, more likely, the two men who wrote the script's) idea of how a teenage girl acts. Having a mind-swap movie work effectively depends almost entirely on the actors being able to portray each other's characters, and Vaughn speaking in repetetive hashtags or early 2000s teenspeak not only doesn't feel like a real teenager, but specifically doesn't feel like the reclusive, angsty teen the first chunk of the movie showed us.

It's also not super suspenseful as a horror given that every killed-off character beyond the first scene is so outrageously awful that there's never even a second thought as to whether or not they're going to get killed off.

Overall not terrible, maybe better to watch with others, not something I'd want to watch again.

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Better watch the I Know What You Did Last Summer TV Series to get a pallet cleanse on the series!

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I am now watching Antebellum.

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Write up for that tonorrow--but I'm also going to watch Don't Breathe!

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72. Antebellum (Hulu)

This one is a doozy to try to describe but here goes.

Antebellum is about a slave who is trying to escape from the confederates, where things are not as they seem.

Seriously, this may be the hardest description because I don't want to spoil anything. And my opinion of this movie is... it's really good. Really, really good. But it's entirely too long for what it is. And by that I mean there's a ton of this movie that could be thrown out entirely and nothing changes. In fact, I'm extremely confused why this movie was as long as it was. At 1 hour 46 minutes, this could be cut down to probably 1 hour or 1 hour 15 minutes if we're being generous. There's so many pointless parts of this movie.

I'm not a huge fan of slavery movies, and that's mostly because they all feel the same to me and they're all absolutely horrible to watch due to the subject matter and realness of them. And there's a lot of it here and a lot of it can absolutely be cut out, with subplots that mean next to nothing.

I can't get too much into the specifics of the plot, but at about the 1 hour 20 minute mark is where things actually get legitimately great. The problem is that there's sooooo much before it that it makes you feel like "Alright what the fuck are we doing here already?" It has a big twist and it's a good one, but it didn't need everything before it to work.

It was legitimately frustrating to deal with, because this movie is expertly directed. The cinematography is out of the world. I want to see what the directors of this film do next because honestly, the best part of this movie is the next level cinematography. And as you get towards the end, it all feels a lot better, but you have to ignore you watched sooooo much of this movie before it where you're left wanting to go "What is going on?" I felt that until, I want to say, 1 hour and 15 minutes into it? Which isn't good for a movie, if you can believe that!

I dunno. I want to recommend this, but I was frustrated for a lot of it, even if it does some legitimately awesome stuff. YMMV on if you want to see it or not based on what I've said.

Rating: 6/10

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I too was pretty torn on it. Honestly it reminded me of The Village in a lot of ways.

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Yeah, I definitely feel that. I didn't feel ripped off like I did with The Village. I thought this was done a lot better as far as the twist goes. But holy crap the pacing of this movie is so bad. Similar idea, but different frustrations involved.

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78. Don't Breathe (Hulu)

I love this movie with an unbridled passion and you should too.

Don't Breathe is about a bunch of burglars who want to steal from an old, blind ex-vet to escape from the hell that is Detroit, except the blind man fights back.

If you haven't watched Don't Breathe yet, just stop reading this and go out of your way to watch it right now. It's an absolute treasure of a film that adds so much tension to a film where the villain is just a blind man who would kick everyone's ass no problem. The situations they put people in are outstanding and leave you guessing, constantly. That's what's best about this movie is how unpredictable it is, start to finish. And just how much they keep throwing you for a loop.

The narrative is also great, as simple and basic as it is. It's literally all that's needed for this movie. But what makes this movie so good is that it's great, and I don't actually have a ton to say about it because it's so simple! Burglars vs. Blind Old Man. That's all you need to know. It's one of the best horror thrillers though and I love it every time I watch it!

Go out of your way to watch Don't Breathe.

Rating: 10/10

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79. American Horror Story: Red Tide (FX)

So uh, I realized that last week was the end of American Horror Story: Double Feature. I thought for sure they'd have another episode, but they did not. So this is a bit late. I'm splitting Double Feature into two write ups though since they're two entirely separate stories.

Red Tide is about a family that moves into a harbor town, and the husband decides to take a pill that will make him exceptional at his writing career, but at a horrible cost.

Charitably, this is an alright season of American Horror Story. I don't think I've ever had the chance to talk about AHS before, so I'll say I think most seasons are absolute trash. This season was slightly less trash because they kept it to 6 episodes.

Red Tide has one really good storyline and that's it. It ends in episode 5 of 6. So episode 6 is just some stupid disaster of an episode that's barely connected and everything you actually cared about gets an underwhelming finish.

Legitimately, this season isn't very good. It kept me through the whole thing without hating it, so that's a plus. But outside of that, I think it had a promising first episode and just stumbled its way to the finish line while holding onto dear life the one subplot that was legitimately good.

It's well-acted for the most part, but god you can't convince me to be that interested in it. It didn't light my world on fire or get me excited at all. So I just grant it the most inoffensive rating I can.

Rating: 5/10

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80. American Horror Story: Death Valley (FX)

So this season was completely garbage and thank god it was only 4 episodes. It ended so poorly I was CONVINCED there was another episode this week.

Death Valley is a story about aliens from back in the 1950's and the results of it in the present day.

It sucks. Everything about this season sucks. Just a complete slog to watch. It has a bunch of conspiracy bullshit, and it's only interesting half the time. They do the most insipidly boring thing you could possibly do with aliens. I enjoy the 1950's aesthetic and Neil McDonough is a delight, but good god almighty who cares about this alien conspiracy bullshit?

And then the present day stuff is even more insufferable. An ENTIRE EPISODE is spent on the sassy 20 somethings that they love to write for this show, and why? Why did this happen? And they're all the most blank slates of characters ever. And the set piece is in a white bunker. And NONE of this is interesting and I'm losing it at how little actual alien stuff they took advantage here. And it ends on the most awful cliffhanger. Nobody could care about any of the characters involved aside from maybe one in the past. It sucks. This might be the show at its worse. It threw away any and all character stuff to give us a lukewarm take on aliens.

Imagine squandering potential as hard as American Horror Story does so much. I only watched this season because my friend loves alien stuff and I wanted to watch with him, and we just hate watched this whole thing.

Absolute trash. All of it. Thank god it was only four episodes long.

Rating: 1.5/10

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81. The Houses October Built (Tubi)

This movie feels like it would've hit me harder closer to when it came out.

The Houses October Built is about a group of friends who are traveling to attend the scariest haunted house attractions in October, but they notice they're being followed by some of the same performers.

I have no idea why, but I swore I saw this movie already and it was something else. I am clearly misremembering.

This is a found footage movie and it's just... you know, one of those found footage movies where there's a lot of "realistic human interaction" which is code for FILLER. But luckily this one doesn't have as much of it without substance. I actually enjoyed this for the most part, but I think I would've loved it if it were just a little bit more interesting?

They build up the spooky folks following them pretty well, but it's just a slow burn with... I dunno, I guess a cool, twisted ending. I expected more though. As it stands, it's an alright film. Not sure I'd really recommend it, even if the scary bits are pretty scary.

Rating: 6/10

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82. Slasher: The Executioner (Netflix)

I finally get to talk about the Slasher series! It's great!

The Executioner is about a girl who returns to her home where her parents were murdered with her husband. But soon there is a copycat killer of the man who had killed her parents many years ago not murdering others in the town.

So for those unaware, Slasher is an anthology series centered around different serial killers. And it's all campy, fun, and actually engaging stories. I don't think there's a season I dislike. It doesn't hold back on the blood and gore and it has plenty of twists and turns as you try to guess who is the killer in each season. And each character gets a focus on their backstory.

The Executioner is the first season, and it's actually great. I forgot how good it was since the first time I watched. It does tons of great stuff to keep you on edge and second guessing everything, while also fleshing out the various members of the town, because the killer is murdering perpetrators of the seven deadly sins, and you can learn more about the members of the town who violate them.

This is reasonably well acted for the most part as well, and it stars Lena Luthor from the Supergirl series in one of her early acting roles, where she occasionally slips into her real Irish accent sometimes.

I can't say enough good things about Slasher. It's always a fun time to watch it play out. This season, in particular, is probably one of the stronger seasons. You'll have a good time watching it, promise!

Rating: 8.5/10

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Movie #25, Cloverfield. So having moved to New York since the last time I watched this, this movie is terrifying, lol

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I can't find what Cloverfield is on, and I wanted to watch that this month too!

But for now I settle with Psycho Goreman!

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ooh I have Psycho Goreman downloaded, need to watch it still

same goes for Censor and Gaia

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I watched Cloverfield on HBO

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Oh did they put Cloverfield on HBO Max recently? Or did they put it under something other than Horror?

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It's under Action for some reason, not Horror

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83. Psycho Goreman (Shudder)

This comedy movie connected with my sense of humor so damn hard and I love it.

Psycho Goreman is about a hardcore alien overlord that is awoken by two children, and intergalactic assassins have come to try murdering them.

Holy shit I can't believe I waited so long to watch this. I loved this with everything I had. Psycho Goreman is absolutely hilarious. Just completely hits with all of its humor and I was rolling through it all. It is the most outrageously bloody and gory movie that goes all in on how fucking ridiculous it is.

Basically, it's a child bonding with a monster movie, except the child is awful, and the monster is just the most edgelord being ever constructed and just talks about killing constantly. It's such a flip on the genre, while still trying to parody the ridiculous elements of it like having him in silly disguises and playing songs.

It's truly, truly an awesome film and I adored every second I watched it. If you want to laugh, watch Psycho Goreman! It even has the best credits theme ever!

Rating: 9.5/10

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84. From Within (Netflix)

This was alright.

From Within is about a town that has a curse where people are committing suicide.

I mean, it's a serviceable horror movie. It does some cool stuff with it, where they show yourself before you die, so it's kinda creepy in that way. Some of the deaths are pretty impactful too. And all in all, I think it did a lot well.

It felt a bit long (even at 1h25m) and the pacing was a bit off. But I had a pretty decent time with it. It just never drew me in, and the curse stuff is kind of not great? Lots of ups and downs with this film, but it ends pretty well. Just nothing to get too excited for.

Rating: 6/10

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Hey friends. Should I watch The Terror or Stan Against Evil for my next show to watch?

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The Terror, god-tier horror show.

Buuuuut I never watched Stan Against Evil even though I definitely should, I know I'll love it.

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How was S2 of The Terror? Never got around to it

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PrivateBiscuit1 posted...

84. From Within (Netflix)

From Within was one of the only movies from the After Dark Horrorfest collections I actually enjoyed

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I'll probably watch The Terror next.

But it's time I finally re-watch The Descent.

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Season 2 was incredible, more viscerally scary in my opinion.

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85. Insidious: Chapter 3 (Hulu)

It's Leigh Whannell's first major directorial effort! And he does a great job!

Insidious 3 is a prequel about Elise helping a family with a malevolent spirit attacking them.

I like it. I don't love it by any means, but I like it a lot. I think there's a ton of creepy stuff here, and Leigh Whannell is a good enough of a director he can really make this film special. I don't think it's a blowaway title, but as a prequel it's a worthy addition to the franchise. The demons, while really good, aren't enough to really carry the movie, I don't think? And I don't think the family dynamic is strong enough either.

But it's stylish, good plot, some legitimately creepy moments. Yeah, there's a lot good here and I don't think it's a huge drop in quality that the 4th movie was. Seeing more Lin Shaye is appreciated too! I recommend it for fans of the first two movies. Just don't expect it to be better than those ones.

Rating: 7.5/10

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Movie #26, Cube. I think I've seen this a dozen times now and I'm always impressed by what they do with an obvious bare minimum of a budget

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86. The Descent (Amazon)

This is always one of my favorites horror movies of all time.

The Descent is about a group of women who go down into an unexplored cave. When they get trapped down there, things get a lot worse.

I could gush about this film for a long time, but I'll keep it short. The Descent does so much with so little. The plot is basic, but it makes the most of it. You see these girls try to survive, you understand their friendship, and you appreciate how hard they're trying to survive. And then you see the development through the movie, and a lot of it is just subtle. And it's all so good and makes sense throughout the movie. But what's best is that everything leaves you conflicted too. What would you do in each situation? It's a lot, but it does it all so well.

The horror aspect of it is amazing too. Just the absolute terror of it all of these shitty caves. Just horrible to navigate, grisly, and just the perfect set piece. It's the best caves set piece you could get in a horror film. And then the crawlers? God damn, the crawlers are just horrific, awful, and terrible to witness. But they're not unkillable. They're not untouchable. You CAN beat them. You CAN fight them. But they're still so deadly. Fighting back is an option, but not forever. Just so well done.

And then the end sequence of thing is so damn wild. Unfortunately, the version I watched had the US version, so I watched the superior UK version instead. So, so, so very good. I love the climax of this movie onward, and the UK ending is just perfect. Must-watch if you watch a must-watch movie like this.

And you should! Go out of your way to watch The Descent! You won't be disappointed!

Rating: 10/10

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I'm going to now watch what is sure to be some delightful trash.

Fantasy Island

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87. Fantasy Island (Starz)

I had low expectations and this was somehow so much below them. I have no idea how anyone on this movie signed onto it, for what reason.

Fantasy Island is about a bunch of people who come to an island where one of their wishes come true.

So I expected just a regular bad movie here. There's so many actors I like in this movie who deserve so much better, and also Lucy Hale is there. But god, imagine you take this concept and make it the dumbest, most convoluted one possible. It suuuuucks so much. It was amusing in how dumb it was sometimes, but it didn't make up for how just dumb it was.

It's not all that scary at all, and it's just... a bunch of hodge podged nonsense thrown together while actors and actresses give it much more than it deserves.

Here are a list of names of people who deserve better than Fantasy Island:
Michael Pena
Maggie Q
Michael Rooker
Jimmy O. Yang
Ryan Hansen
Portia Doubleday
Mike Vogel
NOT Lucy Hale

Just unbelievably dumb and I regret my time, even if there were a few funny scenes and the sheer nonsense of it all entertained me. Don't watch unless you want a disaster.

Rating: 1/10

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88. Cloverfield (HBO Max)

One of my favorite found footage movies! Total fun!

Cloverfield is about a group of friends who are in New York while a horrible kaiju attacks, as they try to survive the night.

There's so much to love about this movie, honestly. It's just a fun, thrilling adventure that has never been done before. A first person look at a kaiju attack? Freaking awesome. It feels realistic, terrifying, and a thrill ride the whole way through, because you never know what's coming next. And you get to experience that terror with everyone in the film.

The plot is fine for what it is. It's more just how we go from one cool part to the next. The characters are enjoyable, again, for what it is. And it's all wrapped up in what I think is a great and fitting conclusion, with a little stinger at the very end to tie it up nicely.

Cloverfield is just fun. Watching it again is just a good time. Recommend it!

Rating: 8.5/10

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89. Child's Play 3 (Peacock)

I did it. I watched the whole starting trilogy of Child's Play.

Child's Play 3 is set 8 years after the last one, where Chucky is back and follows Andy to a military school he's in, and he finds a new child to try putting his soul into.

This one is much like the first two... but not as good? I don't think it's bad by any means. It's still Chucky cracking wise and menacing and murdering folks. It's a formula that's hard to really ruin. It's a weird setting, and Don Mancini said it's his least favorite because he had a year to get a script together and ran out of ideas.

I somehow remember a lot from this movie from when I was a kid. I don't know why. But I remember the ending pretty vividly and a part with Chucky cackling in front of gunfire pretty clearly. But overall... same Chucky you're used to in the first two films. Which is fine. I think it's a worthy edition to the franchise though.

Rating: 6.5/10

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Fantasy Island really kinda tiptoes the line around "bad" and "so bad it's funny"

Not something worth watching solo but probably worth mocking with others

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90. Pulse (2006) (Tubi)

I remember thinking this movie was dumb when I saw it way back when. It still is.

Pulse is about an internet phenomenon that makes you commit suicide, and Kristen Bell's attempts to save the world from it.

I've always wanted to watch the Japanese version because people swear it's amazing, but I needed to see the Americanized one to remember why it sucks so much. And it really does suck. It's not like, the worst thing ever, but the entire concept it just so ridiculous. I like Kristen Bell a lot, and she's probably the highlight of this film.

They have some scares, no doubt jacked from the original, and there's a pretty solid atmosphere. But for the most part, there is very little that this movie does right otherwise, and it fails to engage you with the characters at all. It's just a confusing, dumb mess. And the more you understand of the plot, the worse off it is.

Oh and the ending is awful. Points given only for Kristen Bell's acting and the actual scary bits they probably stole from the Japanese version. I'll need to continue to wonder how much better the source material is...

Rating: 3.5/10

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Movie #27, Hush. So this is incredibly well done. Masked slasher tries to invade a woman's home, but she's entirely deaf so a lot of his tricks won't work and she's better prepared than your average victim. It reminded me a little of You're Next, but not as over the top

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I wanted to watch that again this month! I still may! But it's a Mike Flanagan film, which means it's absolutely quality.

Also, I have Last Night in Soho and Antlers this weekend. Along with the new Paranormal Activity movie.

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Speaking of Mike Flanagan, I'm 5 episodes in on Midnight Mass, and this show absolutely lived up to the hype. I wasn't prepared for how emotionally devastating it is. One of the few TV shows to ever make me tear up.

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3 episodes in on Midnight Mass and definitely enjoying it so far

I also just finally watched Censor tonight and loved it.

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Johnbobb posted...

I also just finally watched Censor tonight and loved it.

Hell yes!

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Yeah, Midnight Mass is a beautiful, horrifying show. I loved my entire time spent watching it! From Episode 3 onward it just gets more and more crazy.

Glad you loved Censor too! It's such a strange movie, but there's so many little things in it.

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I almost wanted to dock a point from Censor just for some of the campiness at times (like the rapey producer falling onto his trophy and it just somehow going entirely through his head even though he fell slowly from a small distance and the trophy would absolutely not have the physical integrity to do anymore than give him a small bruise on the back of his head). But then that last third happens and man, it feels good to see a high concept indie horror stick the landing that well.

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I mean the thing is (Censor spoilers) she's absolutely seeing what she wants to see. We are seeing the film through her lens, and she is absolutely not reliable. For all we know he just got knocked out! He's never addressed after that aside from not being there, IIRC.

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PrivateBiscuit1 posted...

I mean the thing is (Censor spoilers) she's absolutely seeing what she wants to see. We are seeing the film through her lens, and she is absolutely not reliable. For all we know he just got knocked out! He's never addressed after that aside from not being there, IIRC.

yeah that's completely fair, and something I was more willing to forgive once it became more and more clear that she was an unreliable viewpoint. The director losing his head was similarly campy to the point of being exactly what you'd expect from a cheesy low-budget 80s horror movie, which I guess is the point!

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So I got Paramount Plus because I'm going to watch the new Paranormal Activity with the girlfriend this weekend. Actually shocked that they have a huge number of horror movies on this thing. Most seem like trash, but there's a lot there! Idk, I'll probably cancel after even though it's cheap.

Anyway, it's time for Friday the 13th: Part 3.

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91. Friday the 13th: Part III (Paramount+)

I mean, I had to watch at least one of these movies this month, right? Fortunately it's a good one!

Friday the 13th: Part III is about Jason killing a bunch of campers. Also, he gets the hockey mask in this one.

Yeah, do you really expect this to have more of a plot? This is basically THE definitive Friday the 13th movie, honestly. It gives you everything you need and everything he's remembered for. As far as these films go, this is among my favorites.

The kills are good, the campers are entertaining enough to see die and it doesn't waste your time with nonsense. It just has Jason terrorizing campers. Do you honestly want anything else out of these movies? You know what you're getting into.

I can't really say too much more about it. This is what the movie is. You'll either like it or not like it, but it's one of the better ones imo.

Rating: 7.5/10

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3 and 6 are probably the best out of all of those movies. 4 isn't bad either, mainly for Crispin Glover refusing to look at the script and adlibbing everything

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